I just realized she looks like a real-life Bratz doll.

Problem solved.

I require a firm handshake, a love of dogs, and a willingness to try experimental forms of macaroni and cheese.

Saying "I don't know what's wrong with you, my last three girlfriends got off from three minutes of missionary."

I'm trying to decide if I'd rather be a "Muppet face ass" or "trout mouth ass bitch" and I think I'd rather be a Muppet face ass, but there's room for debate.

I encountered tons of Europeans wearing socks and sandals, so Idk.

THAT PHONE CASE THOUGH

Wait, Kesha said her vagina is haunted?

After splitting from Gwyneth he probably farted for a week nonstop. You know she doesn't allow that behavior in the house.

If I could only communicate via Jennifer Lawrence gifs, I would probably still live a relatively healthy and productive life.

As a life-long resident of Whore Island, I have to say that waiting until your wedding day to kiss (or screw) the guy you are supposed to be in love with can only produce disastrous results.

"Kidchella"? They should've named it "North by NorthWest"!!!

And Bill immediately followed that tweet offering Katy sax for her new theme

That shit is so Florida.

This is what my toenails look like when I put my socks on before the nail polish has completely dried.

I NEED this hair.

Poor kid needs some Riot Grrl in her life. They hand you the world's smallest microphone / It's still too loud and you're asked to go home.

#2) This disgusts me so much. If your friends continue to be friends with harrassing douchebag, they are signaling to HDB that he can harass with impunity; that there are no consequences for his behavior. THAT is what you need to communicate to them; not that it "hurts you," but that he has violated societal norms of…

Does anyone remember Dr. Katz from Comedy Central? All these men look like characters from that show to me!

Isnt that ALSO not cool?