Other amateur hour nights: St. Patrick’s Day, Madri Gras, and Cinco de Mayo. I’m a hermit by nature, so I look for any reason to not go out, but these nights in particular are automatic hard nos for me. I’m in bed by 10pm every night nowadays (I have to get up at 5am for work) anyway. I won’t be in any sort of mood to…

My seventysomething aunt has a name very, *very* close to this name thanks to marriage. When I saw Lindy Lou’s name in the first news article that popped up, I did a double-take.

I think you’re talking about this guy, so different person:

Only my coworkers. Mom is dead, Dad takes off for parts unknown for months on end, not really on good terms with my brother, don’t really have friends. I’m pretty much a hermit. I regularly go weeks if not months on end without talking to anyone I don’t have a work relationship with (I’m including people who work in…

My cousin wore a Canadian tuxedo to our grandmother’s funeral. He was a pallbearer. His brother wore a Strip City (a combined reference to a nickname for Portland and the very large number of strip clubs we have here) t-shirt under his sweater. My family is all class, all the time.

This is my one source of comfort here. I do work, and I’m so punctual that it’s practically an office legend. I got to the office at exactly the time we officially start our day on Tuesday, and my boss and coworkers were a bit worried — not because I was in reprimand territory but because I’m always here well before…

This legitimately keeps me awake some nights: What if I die in my sleep, and no one realizes this because I live alone, and then my cats STARVE TO DEATH because there’s no one to check on them? (They won’t be able to just eat my corpse because they’re assholes, so I don’t usually let them in my bedroom when I’m…

When my mom passed away, one of her grandsons (my nephews) was two years old, and the other one was in utero. She directed my father to take them to Disneyworld as one of her final wishes, but she very specifically stipulated that this was not to happen until they were both tall enough to ride *all* of the rides. Mom…

Hey, Portland! Neo-Nazis were actually recruiting at the Lovecraft Bar earlier this year, and the owner made some comments sympathizing with white supremacists. To make this as 2017 as possible at this point, earlier this month, it came to light that the aforementioned owner of the bar has also been known in certain…

#3 is very close to my heart. I’ve never had kids, but I’ve been that two-year-old little girl whose dad shaved off his beard. I completely lost my shit because I didn’t recognize that bare-faced man. After that, my mom had to sit in the bathroom with me on her lap to watch Dad shave so I didn’t scream bloody murder…

Right? Never, ever pick someone who just plead guilty to lying to the FBI, at least if it was a lie told to prop up that moldy squash of a walking obstruction of justice! (Yeah, I know that’s clunky. I’m still pre-coffee.)

Same! That ending was... not what I expected, but not in a twist ending sort of way. More like “wait, *this* is how you are choosing to end this story? Why? There went an hour and a half I’m never getting back.” Such a waste on multiple levels.

If you’re looking for fannish clothes, Her Universe has a lot of these things plus a lot more that don’t make it to Torrid! Thy do straight sizes and plus sizes, and they will show models in each size range so you’re not just trying to guess how that skirt shown on a smaller person will look on a larger person.

Also: If someone is just going to repeat the same fucking talking points over and over AND OVER, there’s really no value in sitting through yet another iteration of it.

I watched El Camino Christmas yesterday because I’m on a mission to watch as many of of those direct-to-video-type holiday movies on Netflix as possible this week, and I was struck by how he’s basically bizarro Sam Rockwell. I mean this in a good way.

Oh, yeah, absolutely agreed. At that point, he was really nothing more than the balding dude from Moonlighting (an explanation for the kids: this was a goofy private detective show on ABC where he was more or less the comic relief) who had tried to be a blues singer the year before. He was a punchline. His rise as an…

If I were in charge of casting the role, my main demand would be that it needs to be someone unknown. One of the big reasons Hans Gruber worked as well as he did was because he wasn’t OMG ALAN RICKMAN at the time he made this. He was just some random foreign dude. This is the movie that *made* him OMG ALAN RICKMAN,…

Oh, hey, same here! Except I wasn’t nineteen. I was twenty-nine. And my artist didn’t say it because of the constant motion. He said it was because the skin is too thin there, and the ink will just literally fall out. Same exact spot on my wrist, though.

I HAVE NOW! Holy shit, thank you for bringing that to my attention. She confirmed every sneaking suspicion I had about the place. (I moved away from Bellevue nine years ago before they opened The Bravern, and now I’m morbidly curious to see what that town is like now. Because I’m absolutely positive I will be even…

Also, some of us have leases that forbid smoking in our homes, and we interpret that as lighting things on fire, so vape pens are totally cool because open flames are not involved.