+1 minimum security prison.

Never have I seen this used more appropriately.

One feels like there’s so much to explore with someone called ‘Deuce Gruden’ in the next Anchorman movie.

I’ll see your Nintendonian and raise you Playsationesque.

Easy now

+1 Creators Update

I love your post not just for the story but for delightfully referring to yourself in the third person so effortlessly.

Stauskas? Stauskas?? ..Stauskas.

I kissed a boy and I liked it

An inconvenient truth.

He clearly likes to kick them when they’re down as well.

“What? This? No, no. I was at a costume party earlier this evening, and the hostess’s dog attacked me so... I had to stab it.”

Strangely, sources from San Antonio familiar with the breathalyser results say he blew a .04

Too soon.

Not many will get that but...bravo.

+2.

Needless to say you’re a lucky man

You summed up the reality of it perfectly in your last paragraph

Look at TNT, all growed up and doing prestige TV!!

+/- 1