They should have just killed two birds with one stone on that call. “Hey Lovie... you’re fired, sorry about that. Now, we’d like to quickly do a 20 minute phone screener for our newly opened Head Coaching position.”

Aww it’s not your fault Eli. It’s just that Coughlin and Mara don’t love each other anymore. But that doesn’t mean they both don’t still love you.

I don’t think calling them morons and jamokes and dinguses and slow-witted white dorks in their best Sunday camo is handling them with kid gloves. I don’t think the solution to the imbalanced application of law enforcement in the United States is for the heavy-handed destructiveness wrongfully applied in certain…

Listen, the very notion that they’re genuinely “doing” anything is flattering to them. If they were serious about some sort of insurrection against government, they could—would—have picked virtually any other building in North America to start it. They don’t want a fight. They want to get interviewed on Fox News.

Cock. Balls.

Try to read that without compulsively stroking your chin in a display of deep contemplation. You can’t!

Seriously. Terrified of plates. Particularly dinner plates. A normal dog is delighted to receive a used human dinner plate, this dog is horrified. We got him as a rescue, so clearly some dreadful dinner plate related event happened in his former life. From now on though, when he shoulder checks me I’m going to pull a…

Hard to say for sure, but I thought it was 5 on 1 and 2 on the other.

Marshawn Lynch - “Lick the gun, lick the gun, lick the gun.” And various other things he said leading up to the Super Bowl.

Cool, Mitch.

Dammit Otto, you have lupus.

if OBJ opened a bar how cheap would his shots be?

What kind of car?

We still don’t know what a catch is :(

First Kyle transfers. Then Kyler is considering transferring. If Kylest goes, it’ll be really bad.

Ass wants more butts

I don’t know, that looks pretty good by Kobe’s standards. He hit at least one out of five there.

What a teaching moment! That kid will ALWAYS remember that night he didn’t get paid for being in a shoe commercial.

That dude in Aldo’s corner with the backwards hat...you’d think he’d just seen his family shot in front of him...damn, man.