heck, Tom Brady did all kinds of crazy shit to his balls

Who wouldn’t want to go to the Miami of Canada?

It is imperative that you stay true to your religious beliefs so that God will allow your unvaccinated children into heaven

This is the most ridiculous RedAction in Cincy since Marge Schott said Hitler was good at the beginning, but went too far.

My body redacted nothing for several days after eating Skyline.

I found out last year that I’ve been overtaxed for 7 years due to the size of my property being incorrectly inflated by the appraisal district. But there’s nothing I can do to recoup my overpayment because of the two year limitation they set. So it only makes sense that my overpayment and his underpayment essentially c…

America doesn’t have a far left movement.

Trump’s going to ban soccer and then the only hobby poor Barron will have left will be staring into the void, waiting for it all to be over

Unless things have changed since the early 2000s, the guy with the restraints is an actual Chicago cop. Which explains his struggle to put a white person in handcuffs.

They were actually chanting Jerry to get the attention of Reinsdorf, so maybe he could sign a free agent that can hit.

I’m pretty sure a third-place, South American, soccer match is the last place the president will show up.

When they play Philly, it’s gonna be the closest thing to a giant rock fight since Greek God and Titan times

Damn it! Why can't anything GOOD happen for the Yankees for a change!

OK, sure, but what about all the good things Dave Portnoy does and stands for?

Why were they interviewing post-bender mark Zuckerberg about barstool sports

“We reached out to three-time Heisman Trophy winner QB #12 but received no response as of publication.”

They may not have a GM but any Wizard worth their salt believes in their staff. 

“Fuck no I’m not paying you for this. a) That was like 20 years ago and b) I said Big POPPA.”

Yeah, not one shot fired in three minutes of footage. Seems nice.

How can you criticize a guy who is always pulling for his teammates?