C’est l’anxiété économique!

The accompanying video isn’t even linked to the article. You have to click on a picture that doesn’t even look like a link to get to another page that has the video on it. I’m sure you can forgive us all for not seeing any of that.

A) sex scandal
B) money scandal
C) treason
D) two of the above
E) all of the above

It might depend on what you do for a living.

^ THIS

Not quite an A+ joke. A solid B at best.

Who was the mysterious, faceless Diane?

The math is technically correct, but completely unrealistic. You could end up with a brown jacket, a yellow shirt, a red tie, blue pants, and black shoes.

I’m assuming this will screw up one’s internet connectivity the next time Amazon Web Services is down, correct?

For the last time, it’s lavender and brown.

Wait, I thought Taurus and Virgo were both earth signs that were supposed to get along with each other.

Somehow I’m able to close the lid on this type of toothpaste while my husband is completely unable to.

And here I didn’t think that a shitty airline would need someone to play devil’s advocate for not ensuring the appropriate space on the flight to begin with, but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

This! This this this. Fucking this.

Airlines are within their rights to kick you off an overbooked plane, even if you’ve paid for a ticket and don’t want to leave. According to United employees, a “computer” picked a man who said he was a doctor and needed to see patients in the morning to be dragged off a flight this weekend.

Correction: 12 things.

My polite-but-oh-girl-no face while watching the ad: