(1) Pink
(2) Blue
(3) Orange
(4) Red
(5) Green
(6) Purple.

FIFY

It’s not tough. It’s simple as hell: Don’t fucking put your hands on people unless they’re inviting you to do so.

Didn’t you learn “keep your hands to yourself” as a kid?

“It can’t be good for any beer blogger’s soggy soul to start the week by putting the word “sucks” in a headline . . .”

Unless you’re reviewing Lagunitas Sucks (pre-24oz.), in which case life is probably pretty good.

I love everything about A Hysterical Man except the use of his latent homoerotic feelings as a way to make fun of him.

No, they’re getting turned in, because the rest of the front of the house needs to be tipped out. Pocket your cash tips, and you’ll get fired really quickly.

The straw man: this fictional server who gets tipped large amounts, all in cash, who doesn’t need to tip out, and who doesn’t report the income to the IRS and…

You’re assuming the server is getting tips in all cash and always refusing to pool those tips (i.e., lying to their employer as well as the IRS).

That’s not how it works. The straw man you’ve constructed requires no credit card tipping, for one thing, and that’s by far the most common tipping method.

It’s only “tax free” if you’re committing tax fraud.

The reason the answer is “yes, they’d prefer the regular wage to tips” is because of the advantages given by predictability and the inability of your employer to steal wages as easily as they can steal tips.

Why do you wish that? They’re two of the funniest people on Earth.

Exactly this. Also: Method acting is bullshit.

Man, FUCK Powder. He sucks so bad, and this story is horrible. I just wanna give you a hug.

In most restaurants, yes.

“Isn’t it strange that I expect good service from every business that I go to, tipped or no tip?”

Yes, because when people are being paid poverty wages, their concomitant responsibility to live up to standards of professionalism are greatly lessened. When they are being paid a wage sufficient to live on without…

The only way you’re consistent on this is if you also don’t ever expect good, friendly, professional service. If you don’t want to pay for servers to have decent pay - either through higher food prices, which is an inefficient way to do it, or through direct tipping, which is an efficient way to do it - then you…

Except that they don’t get paid minimum wage. Without tips, it’s sub-sub-sub-sub-poverty wages.

I don’t think they have to respond. I think they generally do respond out of regard for their constituency (or the veneer thereof).

Maybe they’ve just now started using hyphens correctly?

The detail is amazing, but it’s still obviously a 3D model at the very first glance.

It’s telling that the reason most people take the kids into stores on the most minor, cursory errands with them is not because they think the kids will be in danger otherwise, but because they think some asshole will call 911.