What, hold the phone, Vin Diesel is FORTY NINE GODDAMN YEARS OLD?!

“The Dufresnes are in someone’s trunk right now, with duct tape over their mouths. And they’re hungry. Bush, search party of three!”

Obsessively look around (to see when the drink carts come out), as for coffee grounds and a can of air freshener, then go into the bathroom for a few minutes.

- Someone who has had to eat Trump Steaks and knows you need to frickin’ hold those things in the fire for ten minutes just to make them safe for consumption.

Oh good, I’m not alone. It was a dumb movie, but I had fun in it. And yes, every time Bernthal showed up, I said, “Heeey brother” like Buster because of course. OF COURSE. No awards, but I’ll probably watch it again someday if I’m on a plane. (also I sort of know someone who worked on it, so I have to be careful to be…

I don’t know, if I walked outside and saw a freaking plane parked in my neighbor’s driveway, I’d just start taking pictures. And I’d probably forget about it until the next time (and every time) I walked outside and saw it, prompting me to laugh, “Oh my god, he’s got a FREAKING PLANE IN HIS DRIVEWAY. My neighborhood…

I’ve seen one YouTube Red show, and that was with people I actually liked (Rhett & Link) and that was TERRIBLE. I sat through all eight episodes waiting for it to improve or justify itself, but it never did. I can’t imagine anyone paying a premium for it.

Do you have to find ScarJo attractive to think she’s a good actress? Because I don’t subscribe to either camp.

It’s probably just a coincidence that they’re losing An Inconvenient Truth. Trump can’t tell Netflix what to add and remove, right...? ::looks for complete Apprentice seasons to show up::

I admit, I prejudged the headline itself and didn’t even notice what the number was. Shame on me.

It’s gotta be something along these lines.

I guess this officially makes him a Motherfucker.

I want to start a petition to replace “mic drop” with “Taraji adjusts her glasses.” Every time she did it, I wanted to punch the air for her.

Welcome back! Wish we weren’t in a climate where you weren’t so desperately needed, but since we are...

Charlie Work was maybe one of the best episodes of ANY se— well, let’s not go overboard. But it was definitely amazing. And the season 12 premiere was awesome. Long live Sunny!

To long, not enouf pitchers. Cater two the ill literates, fucko.

My thought was Girl 2 and Girl 4 were sitting on one of their legs, with their other leg draped over the Legless Girl’s legs. But that would require them to be wearing matching pants and have superhuman flexibility and expert trolling-the-internet skills.

Person of Interest, where they finally made good on all the years of teasing/flirting (well, sort of). But no one could deny Root and Shaw were a couple by the end of the series.

Sing Street is also on the Netflix.

Gangsta.