I laughed out loud at the thought of Ciara going fishing and saying fuck it, takes out a handgun and goes to town. Thanks.

Did Lala get training in being an extra in a music video? Ariana takes it very seriously since she trained in being a music video extra and it’s going to offend her if Lala just decided one day she was gonna be a music video extra.

I’m horrified by how much I’m liking this.

Thanks for this. Now I can pass that kindergarten graduation test that’s been bedeviling me.

Finding out what it’s like to fall and break your hip?

Thank you. Beyoncé couldn't act wet in a swimming pool.

No, it’s Kewpie.

Fuck no go to the Asian grocery store and get a Kewpie. Only then will you realize that American mayo is hot garbage fire.

Huh. And I had heard such good things about mashed onion.

When reached for comment, the Capulets answered “How now! who calls?” but hung up right away.

On the right he looks like he just modelled for a youtube tutorial on “all the brow mistakes you don’t know you’re making”.

Wayne Gretzky is in fact alive today.

Pairing the dress with the headline, I thought it was going to be “Jennifer Lopez Has Eyes...and they’re up here.”

Maybe they were just trying to give girls a realistic look at what it’s like to be a woman in a STEM field. They did a pretty good job in that regard!

I feel like this cover might have done even more damage.

Yeah, maybe she should just let him follow his own #rebelheart.

This story will only be complete when we find out one of her old clients disguised themselves and pulled a long-con as a bookkeeper to get their revenge.

I’m 6 weeks pregnant and so far the main symptom is tearing up at the drop of a hat. I held out till “a black president” and then LOST IT. Sobbing.

Missed headline opportunity: “Do You Really Want to Hurt Me?”

Kim says Kanye just has a “problem controlling his impulses.”