she’s like rich russian tacky, which is the woooorst kind of tacky.

Rude people live everywhere. Mr. Portas and I chose to have only 1 child. People constantly asked when we were having another. After I said we weren’t planning anymore they had no problem telling me how bad for a child it was not to have siblings. That only children were spoiled, socially awkward, blah, blah, blah. I…

my vag rocks! I don’t need rocks

It’s mariJUANa, not marijuanA

I googled “devil doing yoga” and was not disappointed:

I had a devout, pious Catholic girl at my high school who refused to take any philosophy courses because “it messes with your mind.”

I do. Please note that I am not into health food, I am into champagne.

I gave up on religion a long time ago, but now I’m considering becoming a practicing Jew just so I’ll get executed quickly when America becomes Gilead.

I suggest she adds The Rock and a lot of muscle cars to the story. She could probably squeeze out another 6-7 seasons that way.

someone far cleverer than me once described him as a poor person’s idea of a rich person...that seems to be on display here.

Real Talk: how are we all going to die?

Oh god he’s chanting “U.S.A!” in his tweets.

Sex is my favorite stress reliever. I’ll give you my sex when you take it away from my cold, dead vagina.

omg i have ZERO filter. Ever. This is very true. Total inability to dial back anything about myself. Like, the way I type is EXACTLY how I speak.

I am drunk and really rooting for this to work out

Look at the amount of pressure you’re putting on yourself. It’s worse than someone who has social anxiety and never has positive interactions with people: you’re being extra hard on yourself because you ARE good at interacting but fail in this particular instance. You’re probably going to dates with a “shit, how am I…

I am unexpectedly pregnant with what would be our 3rd child. I have a 4 and 2 yr old. I am already overwhelmed and yell a lot and my husbands works long hours so I’m usually alone with the kids, the animals, the chores. I’ve been a stay at home mom for almost 5 years. Finally about to see the light at the end of these…

Clearly not as good as yours !!!!

“...suffered a minor lower-body wound (no article specifies where...”

Well that’s interesting, because I thought Madeline’s affair was conspicuously the weakest element of the series, to the point I felt it superfluous.