I’m drunk.

Timothy Forsyth: What A Fucking Asshole.

Welp looks like my decision to be shitfaced drunk for the next 4 years has gained even more validity.

Anyone else having trouble logging in to comment thru the AV Club? I was forced to use Disqus, which is missing 95% of my past comments.

I would rather watch a cut of the Star Wars prequels that only contains the Galactic Senate scenes and Jar Jar. THIS IS WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO ME, AV CLUB. THIS IS YOUR LEGACY.

When is someone gonna steal that extra 'D' from "Mudd"?

I would rather see 500 "GJI" articles on this site than ONE MORE about the fucking Fast & Furious movie series.

lol nah

"Nah, that ain't me man! I'm from Buffalo!" still cracks me up.

Prepare to be amazed!

I like to tell people I'm going to a "goals assessment meeting" when really I'm just going to smoke weed.

My favorite Steve Martin anecdote was when he advertised an evening where he would talk about art, and then everyone in the audience got pissed because he actually talked about art.

I completely forgot Eddie's Asian character from that piece of shit movie. Even Mickey Rooney thought it was racist as fuck.

Funnier fact: Kevin Bacon, to this day, will sometimes bribe wedding DJs so they don't play the "Footloose" theme because people expect him to still do that stupid dance 30 years after the movie came out.

Is that the R. Kelly remix?

I think the point the writer was trying to make was that it probably wouldn't go over so well if Eddie got up on stage today and yelled about "fa**ots" for an hour and a half.

How pissed is Chris Tucker that Kevin Hart stole his shtick?

Easily, if not more. And he's spending a good chunk of it on lawyers and civil suits. Too bad he won't die a bum on the street though.

When are we gonna get a sequel to "Showtime"?!

I'm sure that rapist fuckwad still thinks he's morally superior to all of us. God I can't wait for him to die.