Oh god, their need for drama and lack of respect for boundaries is a horrendous combination, isn’t it? Everything is done for effect, and other people are just “characters” in a play all about them. When you challenge them about things they have said and done, they deny it, call you a liar and then give you hell for…

IKR?

This is within my parents normal range of empathy (or lack of it), they’re very blinkered when it comes to understanding that the things they say and do might be horrid. The good thing that comes out of that is I can take care of myself as requested, because having no one to rely on for support at home when growing…

Oh my god, I live near the main airport in my region, so stop & searches are very likely if there’s any threat alerts! I didn’t even think about that!

Actually, come to think of it, each time I’ve cut them off and then caved in and allowed contact, the hold they had over my painful past and present has diminished. You’re definitely on to something with how it’s helped you work through things. I guess being able to see them coming back with less power each time has…

Oh they are absolute textbook NPD. The shit they’ve pulled over the years seems almost fictional when I list it all up. I’m wondering if this might be the push I need to commit to cutting them out without feeling guilty, nothing sharpens the mind more than a brush with a serious medical situation.

I’ll keep everything crossed for you, no one should put up with someone being a complete shit purely because they’re made to feel bad for doing something to protect themselves.

Even better, whilst there’s an £8.80 prescription fee for regular medications (one of the few costs from the nNHS), if you have cancer that fee is waived for the next 5 years after you are given the all clear, and if you are on any type of permanent thyroid medication, your prescriptions are free for life!

Not thought of finding a support group - I’m pretty certain my Macmillan Nurse will have resources there. Thank you for the heads-up!

I briefly knew what it felt like to be a Trump supporter!

They are best kept at arm’s length, they’re a classic NPD codependent couple and made my childhood hell. My problem is I keep folding under pressure when I’ve been no contact, I need to grow a damned backbone!

Mwahahahaha!!! Just the thought of that makes me cackle and arch my fingers. I’m not sure if that makes me a bad person, mind you. I’ve been good all my life, and karma’s given me cancer for my efforts, maybe it *is* time to become evil. Like, Bond villain evil.

Thank you! You’ve been through one heck of a lot, I hope things are smoother for you now!

It’s almost like the ol’ brain meats shut down at the prospect of an illness that is completely out of your hands to deal with. I guess that no matter how prepared you are for something, it still hits you like a tonne of bricks!

Cheers Zeetal. It’s not as sucky as the types of other cancers, but it wasn’t one of my top life experiences to achieve!

LOL! True, I very much have bigger fish to fry!! Actually, someone was selling “kiss my ass, cancer” charity wristbands at work. Great concept until you turn the band sideways and it just says “ass cancer!”...

It’s all good, now I’ve got used to the diagnosis I feel I can get my life back on track - a lot of things were “on hold” until I knew what I was dealing with. Now I’m able to return to work for a bit with my manager knowing it’s a temporary thing and to plan around my future absence. He’s been an absolute star, and…

<3 thank you!

Thank you! I’m very positive about the prognosis, it looks to be just a “blip” of an illness - as far as it seems, even the treatment is very mild. That somewhat eased the sting, I couldn’t face the sort of things people with aggressive cancers have to go through.

Thank you! The impression that I got is that whilst it’s cancer, it’s so easy to treat that it’s no riskier than my pancreas being inflamed was. I’m luckier than the vast majority of cancer patients in that aspect!