Yeah, what could possibly go wrong?

We’re not putting our best people in charge.

Speaking of thematic messes, the Haunted Mansion model kits are being re-released as “House of Horrors” (sans Disney branding, as was the recent case with the Pirates of the Caribbean kits as “the Jolly Roger series”). These featured an executioner disturbing a ghoul while freeing a chained dwarf, a mummy jumping out…

...Oh, you...you meant don’t...don’t Google images. Excuse me, I have to go scream and vomit alternately for the rest of my life.

I’ve got some undiagnosed condition in which hairy skin + warm weather + elastic = horrid itchy rash. It spreads with time. Got rid of my work boots and wear ankle socks, shave my waistline when it’s really hot because of the band on my underwear. This year it decided to spread to my crotch, so I pulled out the…

Crackling sound when touching the affected area.

A fool and her prolapsed vaginal tissue are soon...soo...HURK!!BLAAAAARRRRGH

Probably just still pissed about Ariel. Also also too, why aren’t all movies about God Emperor Donald Trump and how God Emperor Donald Trump is super awesome?? /s

Come on, now. Yes, it’s horrifying to contemplate but we’re living in the dimension in which Rush Limbaugh, Donald Trump and Newt Gingrich—among other abhorrent cretins—are not only married, they’re on their third/forth/eleventh wife.

Guess it’s “shovel ready.”

Which genre, though?

I have been, and always shall be, a fan of Texts From Superheroes.

Also also too, the whipped-up MURIKAFUGGYEH pseudopatriotism is perceived as a marketing tool for military recruitment. That’s why the government pays U.S. football big money to shove players out onto the field for the anthem.

As soon as someone turns away from the flag, moves, talks, etc. heckle them

IT TURNS OUT IT’S MAN

(see “How SJWs Ruined ____” in recommendations)

I don’t know about anyone else, but if it tastes like cooked pork by-product yet is ice-cold, my body’s reaction is usually instantaneous, violent, and messy.

Wh... Whaaaaaat.

You popped your yap off for attention, and you got it. What’s the problem?

Tim Story’s live-action Tom & Jerry movie