I wouldn’t have thought of Burton on my own, but he’s now the only choice I can imagine. 

I’d pay good money to see this, but first get yourself some bullet proof glass on that rental. 

You seem to be missing the point. People are criticizing him for shit he did LITERALLY LAST YEAR. If his lack of a grownup brain allows you to say he maybe shouldn’t be judged for that, his lack of a grownup brain means he shouldn’t be sitting in a position of power. Find a better hill to defend. There are people who…

Looks like one of the masks from The Purge. I’m guessing he fancies himself an intimidating fellow. 

Oh fuck. 2020’s going to kill Patton Oswalt with Wesley Snipes dressed as Blade. 

Be better, CNN. You’re not Wendy’s and you need to quit the sassy social media game. 

I’m glad to see Grimtooth is still alive and innovating in 2020.

I was thinking the drone Speed Racer stores in the hood of the Mach 5. 

And if it did, it would have involved a canned chicken and that cheese with maggots. 

Riiiight. Here I am thinking of waffles and I completely forgot to consider paranoid ravings about Jewish people and global domination. Fuck, these nazi idiots are exhausting to keep track of.

What did Belgium do to piss these folks off?!

I’m betting he walks out after the first muting. 

I 100% would order milkshakes brought to me whenever I wanted if I was POTUS. I’m also smart enough to know I should never come close to having either the power of POTUS or the power of milkshake summoning because I’m that irresponsible. Yet here we are, with this bastard in the office and an unsettling number of…

I did not realize Joe Bob Briggs was the mayor of Wichita. 

He’s like cat videos on the internet!

BA continually falling for the old “sedatives in the milk” trick does sound like it might fit in with this administration’s level of sophistication though. 

And no way is Ice Cube allowed in the pool at any of 45’s clubs. 

But the real question is how will Pornhub take advantage of this controversy? 

This. I’m perfectly comfortable saying Hunter’s Ukrainian job reeks of an attempt by another country to curry favor with someone who was and may again be power-adjacent. But the amount of far worse stuff that 45’s supporters need to wade through to reach a point where anyone can shout about corruption over this is…

Thanks to his smartphone he doesn’t have to tell us...he can show us!