I ran it over my wrist to make sure it wouldn’t burn the baby’s mouth

McDermott ran the draft. They just forgot to fire Whaley ahead of time. It’s pretty Brownsian in its failure.

So they let the GM run the draft which will presumably dictate the shape of the franchise over the next few years, and promptly fire him immediately afterwards so that some other guy can take over the GM duties with both players and a coach he hasn’t picked?

Robert Edwards comes to mind. He played again, but it took a while and he didn’t last long once he did come back.

“uh something happened, non-contact, everyone started throwing up, and now his leg doesn’t work”

1) buy stupidly expensive cat toy

The reason no one mentions the dead man’s crimes is that they are irrelevant to the way he was treated while in custody. 

and a fistful of acclaimed drug films helping secure its place among the major substances of the decade.

Producer: Good God!

It’s the Browns. This is like Schrödinger’s Draft Pick. Whoever they choose has a 50% chance of being a dead cat.

What if you take a teammate’s water and drink it to make your pee clearer? Who’s the selfish teammate then? Really makes you think...

Red should be immediately relabeled “Urine big trouble mister”. They pissed that opportunity away.

When they grab you with those metal claws, you can’t break free. Because they’re made of metal, and robots are strong.

did he talk to you about robot insurance

Interesting comma in the headline. Makes is read like they were busted for working at Arby’s and being heterosexual.

Switzerland disagrees with your statement

Like all of his seven essential qualities, Lombardi defines “the thickest skin,” basically, as “good enough at football that I can point to him and say he has whatever buzzword I’m pushing and people will nod and say ‘Yes, he has that.’”

I just want to say that, as an owner, I’m extremely interested and am going to do everything in my power to get Sherman in a Packers uniform next season.

Wait till you hear what they’re asking for in return for Mr. Peabody.

Reminds me of an Onion article where Jared Leto thanks acting for being something easy that everyone can do.