HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

I'm not working tomorrow but I'm still at work even though we're supposed to close at 1. AND IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I have to go to the Verizon store after work then go home and clean my apartment before 3 when my friends show up. UGH.

Off topic but I am dying at this truth:

BMI is dodgy. I can put 10 kilos and my BMI is still "underweight" and other negative things even though I eat just as much of not more than a lot of women. I have a very small frame and I have to eat incredibly unhealthy fried foods to put on weight to bring my BMI up. It's not a sign of health eating pizza for…

This sort of thing pisses me off. My partner and my best friend are both super active and super fit, but carry what some would call "excess" weight (maybe 40 or 60 pounds?), and they get no end of grief from their doctors, families, and strangers. It's not fair to them. I am lazy, out of shape, and a "healthy" weight,…

One issue I have with fitness freaks is that their lifestyles AREN'T healthy. If they stop what they are doing for a week, they put all the weight back on. They manipulate their body in a completely unhealthy way. They don't even have balanced, healthy diets. The idea of cheat days and eating a truckload of carbs to…

I can't get over how deluded and uninformed some of these fitness 'professionals' are. I am not skinny. I can fit into size 12 if I suck in my stomach a little. And you know what? I'm healthy. My doctor has told me plainly that my weight isn't a concern. I am physically fit. And yet according to this woman, I'm…

Their whole system is outdated and ridiculous. You can easily switch price stickers or just outright steal from them because, at least the store I was at, had no security cameras.

Gift Certificates to Romeos Anal Rejuvenation and Mexican Food Pavilion.

I get it. They like her. She's refreshing and candid and honest.

I'm not sick of Jennifer Lawerence. But I sure am sick of Jezebel's coverage of Jennifer Lawerence and the insistence she the ideal BFF for everyone ever. YIPEEEEEEEE

Dude, we get it. You really love her. How many different stalkerish articles do you need to publish to get your point across?

Over and above everything else, ( pneumonia, black mold, maybe poison) she did have a heart condition.

Both my parents are heavy drinkers, EXPLAIN TO ME WHY THEY'RE DIVORCED

This made me snort. In college we used to say that hairy forearms on a dude = hairy butt.

I actually had a woman on OkCupid send me a "Hi" message. I deleted it, then decided to message her. Upon concluding my message, and asking how her day was, I received the following response:

My favorite is "Your cute". My cute what?