Ah, I see your point. Sorry about that. To be perfectly clear: there are no bombs in your foreskin! Foreskins do not need to be handled like Faberge eggs! And all penises are equally wonderful!
greenheart
greenheart
I’m married, and I don’t get this either. My relationship is no different than it was before we got married. It’s nice to be considered each other’s family now, but when we’re at home, hanging out together, it doesn’t feel different to be doing it as husband and wife v. boyfriend and girlfriend. I think that people… Read more
Shit, this has me spooked. It’s hard? That’s a constant? I mean, yeah, we argue occasionally, because that’s life. But 10 years and one baby down, and I wouldn’t describe it as “hard.” Does this mean the other shoe is about to drop? Do I not have a “real” marriage? Is this all a farce and I’m going to find out about… Read more
I go through a metric shit ton of Costco-brand lactase pills. They work- I still can’t really drink milk, but I can eat soft cheeses again. The problem I run into is that people think I’m lying and give me “surprise dairy”- as in, I ask if there’s dairy in this, they say no, and 15 minutes later I’m digging through my… Read more
This week, Oregon passed a new law that allows women to buy hormonal contraceptives from a pharmacy without a…
Heard an amazing “This American Life” about this. It was truly inspiring! (Sigh).
Guess what’s got my large intestine in a septic knot today, MANmerica? The extreme pussification and dude-slicing…
I just sent this in but I am a grey and it probably won’t get read. In negotiations for a three-some with my current male lover we had a plan whereby I was having a promising third man (who is bi) over. I was to warm him up to the idea and then invite lover #1 over. I wrote: “He is adorable. I can’t wait to have you… Read more
My good friend/sometimes fuck buddy.
“I just need it! It’s like I’m a diabetic and there’s insulin in your ass and I have to get it with my tongue!” Classy.
“I’ll reach up and grab your waste and pull you into my face.” Read more
“I would eat cereal out of your asshole” Read more
“I know I’m not the most handsome guy, but I bet I’d look a lot better with your pussy juice all over my face.” Read more
I fucking love the idea of using Socratic Questioning in the style of cognitive-behavior therapy in sexting. I’m just gonna ask you questions until you reach the conclusion I’d like you to reach; it’s much more salient if you’re able to get there on your own. Read more
I like to send awkward sexts because I’m horrible at dirty talk. Read more
A couple of weeks ago, I was trawling Soundcloud when I was abruptly paralyzed by something—a track with the fairly…
Now I see that my cat has been reading this, and it all is so obvious. Like when I wake up in the middle of the night to find him lording over me staring with murder in his eyes, I sometimes catch his eye quickly and (like the email) he breaks eye contact like it was an accident and leaps off the bed making a loud… Read more
Huh. You'd think a doctor's office would be more understanding!
Social assistance is a touchy topic. Some think it’s a necessary part of improving the poverty problem; others think…