Hey you just described why I hate Dr. Phil so fucking much!

I told a joke to my old boss once. He was Catholic, I am Catholic, I figured he would enjoy it: What do you call a sleepwalking nun?

Ugh.

From his description it sounds like a movie about a man disguised as a movie about women: the important thing about these women is what they taught HIM.

Set aside the whole Sandusky thing for a moment...Paterno was damn near worshipped his entire time there...was made to be some savior or hero to all of the university for all the good work and charity he gave the university. When all that good work was essentially coaching football and maybe donating some money every…

Here's the thing that all the Paterno corpse fellaters fail to appreciate: Paterno could have ended this whole thing with one phone call. No, not to the cops or the school administration; to the media. You want justice in this country while maintaining your reputation? You call a fucking journalist and tell them…

"Football was more important to them than saving children."

Wasn't it Agatha Christie who said "Every murderer is someone's old friend?"

Yeah there's the "kid got busted drinking in the park with his friends" and then there's "kid rapes a girl and takes a photo" ... not QUITE the same thing.

"Police say they don't have enough evidence to charge. They also waited ten months to investigate."

You have to respect this level of premeditated trolling. Walton ordered the book, brought it to the game, waited for his chance on live tv.

The one thing we're not quite sure of, though, is how worried anyone should have been by the prospect of a guy who couldn't hit maybe trying to hit them.

Upton Sinclair: 'It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it.'

Also buried on WWE RAW? Cesaro, Dolph Ziggler, and Dean Ambrose.

I knew a guy who was a lot like Jeremy Renner. Made tons of inappropriate jokes and was always desperately asserting his heterosexuality. He is happily living with his husband in Phoenix now.

At last, evidence that you should always bring Spears to a knife fight.

It's almost worth it to find a used copy of this game and the necessary controller to play "Something for Nothing."

I just can't with this. You know what's disrespectful? Turning your fucking back on the Mayor of New York because you're upset that he, what? Talked about having to protect his son from police violence? Fuck right off with your jeansgate.

Mark Sanford came back from all the lying lies and deceit. That scared me.

"Tonight.... you."