So I’m mid-dying, but slowly enough that I have time to soak up some pop culture? Yikes. I guess if no one is willing to smother me, maybe cue up some Fringe? Something I enjoy but probably won’t make me laugh, which I assume would be painful at that stage. I don’t see the point in going all philosophical with it.

This is a good take on ghosts.

I’ve only had the Lithuanian variety, with the sour cream mixed into the soup itself to make it bright pink, but it was pretty good.

I’m inclined to believe that rich and powerful titans of industry can probably figure out a way get out of jury duty. Not to mention ones whose companies are frequent targets of supercriminal activity.

Hell or High Watermelon tastes like a Jolly Rancher and is nigh undrinkable.

Huh, I didn’t even consider if he had rigged the pool. I just assumed he lucked into jury selection, and instead of getting out of it (recusing himself out of respect for the system), he said “fuck it, let’s make sure he gets locked up.”

Whatever I have that’s fastest to make. Frozen raviolis (cooked, obviously) is always a good pick.

Nothing is better when it’s too hot to think than a nice sour beer (SeaQuench is my jam).

Pop-Tarts are just a lazier, shittier, more-mobile version of Toaster Strudels.

It’s been months since I’ve been able to make a comment, or even star a comment, on The Takeout on mobile. Only The Takeout.

If only you had made more videos nobody wanted to watch.

If he’s actually whispering it, it’s not particularly helpful in this example.

THANK YOU. Goddamn am I sick of seeing the Democratic blame game in every single fucking article.

I skimmed it, which is frankly more than generous.

I mean, their president tweets shit worse than this like every day so....

Yikes.

Against Me! has 3, not even counting all the ones that are titled like “Against Me! is...” and the name that everybody actually uses for the album.

She misinterpreted, Michelle wanted us all to GET as high as we can.

Yeah the showstopper really brought this episode back. Almost everything looked, er uh, scrummy. Wrt the banana tart signature, I’m calling Paul’s reaction a de facto handshake.

Seriously. Like christ, who fuckin cares. This might have been a story 3 years ago. But now? Shouldn’t even be a blip on the radar.