Would you rather they say things like:

I keep waiting for that Wanda Sykes/Margaret Cho ticket!

As a Georgia O’Keefe fan, I believe all vulvas are God’s creation. Whether they resemble a flower or an anthill.

“as thirsty as a high-maintenance house plant” is my new go-to in bro-jibes.

My favorite part is the link to the communist manifesto. Overall truly a remarkable piece that contrasts the quixotic with the pragmatically nihilistic aspects of our modern politic.

What if Gawker just stopped reporting on anything Trump did? Would it possibly increase their value and reputation as a source of information? Hasn’t Trump exceeded any reasonable level of exposure based simply on his pre-existing celebrity? Why do you continue to feed the greatest troll in history Gawker?

What if maybe Elon Musk is one of the few intelligent people with somewhat legit morals who happened onto a great situation(mid-internet bubble era) and benefited? The guy has a physics degree, which changes the way you think about the world in a fundamental way. Nothing physical ever lacks a reason for you. The idea…

You might be ignoring the fact that Hillary Clinton actively undermines her own credibility by constantly seeming disingenuous.

#5 doesn’t seem too strange for a writer at an internet blog. Plus, they are the swiss army knife of fruit.

HEY I WAS RIGHT! You’re a total burner account and had nothing to contribute. In case you ever actually see this, you can keep your tactics to yourself although I’m sure the 4th Reich wouldn’t disapprove of some social anxiety being prevalent.

Are you one of those white people who tries to mock internet comments with sarcastic outrage? Nah, probably just a troll.

These ladies should totally respond by posing with the “one-finger” salute instead. Something we can all agree is a non-partisan, apolitical gesture.

Are the bananas raw and unpasteurized? If a considerable portion of her diet is smoothies or blended stuff I could see maybe 3-4 bananas per “meal”. Which means that she consumes like 13 banana-infusions a day.

Yeah, if I was involved in the prosecution on this that’s EXACTLY what I would be thinking. How far removed from academia or any kind of privileged success could I make this guy? It would honestly keep me up at night.

Am I the only one who thinks that the ages of the those involved are FAR LESS important than the nature of the crime itself? Like who cares that this guy is old enough to chug jagerbombs or whatever, the crucial part is the coercion of the act...right?

Let’s just be honest. These kinds of laws are being designed to specifically target people. Not just transgender people or even people of “questionable-adherence” to gender norms. These kinds of laws are put into place to make those who are more than a percentage away from standard normalcy WANT TO MOVE AWAY. And…

To be fair, Cruz has always been better with numbers than analogies.

“Oh no poor Sanders! He’s such an almost octogenarian man.” God forbid he take a break after a hectic and emotional event to recharge where he feels comfortable. I know I like feeling safe and sound after dealing with difficult stuff, maybe other people do too?

Maybe the tiger didn’t like what she was whispering...

Herm, why can’t I get a “first-bump” from the president, much less anyone else. Now I’ll never be cool.