golf, chris.

“I asked a question, and someone answered! Punish them! I conceded and they let me! Punish them!”

I’m just glad Han is no longer alive to witness this shit

“In retrospect, he was absolutely grooming me,”

It truly seems like a common theme with the Cavs. Either they are ready for Game 1 or they are just like let’s see what they do and we’ll adjust in Game 2. I still say Cavs win in 6

I don’t like Roseanne. She’s coarse and rough and irritating, and she gets everywhere.

I feel like we should make “Fat Guy Touchdowns” worth 10 points. I would do anything to see more lineman rumble in with the ball from 10+ yards out.

Is there some available coach out there who has a secret plan for making James less good at basketball?

We gather here today to celebrate the life of Jalopnik reader ‘Nascar Caution’, who died unexpectedly when someone joked about Bernie Ecclestone taking over Nascar. Anyone wishing to say a few words, come forward and turn left, then left again, and again. 

4. Probably wouldn’t have been blackmailed

6. I could have prepared a run for president in 2016 — and apparently, I could have won.

7. Ten year headstart growing out beard for inevitable gig as mall Santa.

8. I could have been in the running to replace Conan.

Brian France screwed NASCAR with gimics, and now that its on a downturn, he is trying to unload it. Good thing his grandfather and father are dead, because they would kick him out of the family for what he has done.

Yeah, and probably more to this or why not lie your way out of it? If this was a totally isolated incident I assume you could get away with a ‘I thought it was mine’, ‘I thought it was someone elses’s and I was returning it but left it in my car’.......

Stallone’s next role will be Meltman: With the power to...melt....

I’m pretty sure they make more than $130K.

Fisticuffs spelled backwards is racecar

Who among us hasn’t fought the urge to break a boss’ jaw at some point?