Apparently the Browns plans to beat the Steelers or Ravens in the playoffs is to just stack the Patriots. Honestly, I have to respect that strategy. 

I don’t know about you, but I often attack people with my neck and my chest. You should see the bruises I get. It’s a bold move. People don’t expect you to come at them neck first.

“That reminds me, what ever happened to Wes Welker?”

Shaughnessy: I’d like to ask about Malcolm Butler.

I guess I’d move half wya around the world for $25M.

Then we get to the most bizarre pitch of the competiton: a pitcher delivering the ball from the zenith of a trampoline bounce

Things I Would Do In Putin’s Russia, Ranked
1) Get hit by a bus (Russian drivers are crazy).
...
Last) Invade the pitch of the World Cup final in the name of Pussy Riot (I’m a coward).

Can we talk about how the coach of this team is noted warlock ‘Doyle Balthazar’? 

God I would hate to be a Houston Raptors fan come playoff time 

Are you the guy in the blue shirt? 

Director of Internet Content for Sinclair Broadcasting.

What if you beat him to it in an alternate universe?

Eh, predictable. Just like his mom, he couldn’t resist the West.

Your username is ORLANDOMAagic91 but you’re also the type of person that refers to the Lakers as “We”?

But enough about Phil Jackson’s dick ...

Never left? I can count the number of those little Laker car flags I’ve seen in the last five years on one hand. And I’m Jason Pierre-Paul.

If he sounds like a outraged hen normally, he might go full ultrasonic squawking now.

+ badness 10000

+98

Correct. This is a developing story and we will be updating as warranted.