All I know is that one time when I was 14, I was being a total bitch to my mother as we were walking down Oxford St in London. Instead of getting cross and telling me I was being an asshole, my mother (a creature of mirth and magic and farts) proceeded to drop her shopping bags and began to perform a jig. It was a…

Rumor has it that McCarthy and Ellmers have called in ex-Michigan legislators Todd Courser and Cindy Gamrat to handle crisis management.

Ooooh man. It’s still live on her wiki page under the Personal Life tab https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Renee_Ell…

I feel that this is yet another issue that Hilary has flip flopped on and proves she is an incompetent leader. A woman’s place is providing space for GestatingFetuses, and she should leave policy decisions to GestatingFetuses that recognize the importance of our Second Amendment Rights.

I disagree. Our conference needs strong leadership and McCarthy, though a dedicated Republican, has not appropriately surrounded himself with the reproductive system of a human woman (as Republicans have been so concerned with) and does not have the appropriate dedication to our Second Amendment rights.

THEORIES

God, the mess of obnoxious Republican white men are starting to become one horrifying blob in my mind. “Paul Ryan. Is he running for president? Wait, not Rand Paul.” *pictures a dude* “No, that’s Scott Walker. Why do I hate Paul Ryan?” *googles image* “Oh, hiiiim. Yeah, that’s right, he sucks too.”

Guys, are we 100% sure he bowed out? This guy can BARELY string together three words coherently. He’s like one of those weird cases on House where somehow the intonation is the same but the words don’t make sense and all we know is that it’s not lupus.

I don’t see why they don’t just ask Kim Davis to use her Jesus magic to bring Ronald Reagan back from the dead.

In a room full of narcissistic thieves no one wants to step up to lead and become the next fall guy.

i enjoy that everyone is so terrified of whats to come that we are legit in mourning about boehner leaving

He’s not even a good representative of Bakersfield, which says a lot. His local office literally keeps the front doors locked so constituents can’t come in.

Excuse me: the new House Speaker is clearly A Gestating Fetus With A Gun

meanwhile, at the Boehner household:

Congratulations to new House Speaker A Gestating Fetus

The guy who sexually assaulted me and then brought a bayonet to a band concert with a hit list, threatening to kill me and other exes, wasn’t even charged with a misdemeanor. Why? Because the school didn’t call the cops the minute they found him with the weapon. They took the weapon, gave it back to his parents, and…

How has he only been charged with misdemeanours?? I assume he mustn’t have actually had any weapons, although can’t find any confirmation of that. Does anyone know otherwise?

Normal people go to the internet for their nudes. This guy obviously wants to dominate the girls. He doesn’t care about the pictures. He just wants to show he can make people do what he wants. And if they don’t, they get slaughtered.

Well, he would not have just stood there clothed.

Geez, what the fuck does that even mean?!