My niece married into a family that has a tradition of singing Paradise By The Dashboard Light at parties. They all just go crazy, singing their heads off.

My fiancee and I were thinking K-Ci and JoJo’s classic “All My Life” - we both think first dances are stupid, so might as well have a junior high burner and invite everyone else out at the end. YAY OR NAY!?

Thanks for doing this. WE ALL MISS PISSING CONTEST! Great stories tonight!

Well I’m probably about 9 months into depressingly fruitless job searching and like a month ago I got a call asking if I could do a Skype interview but I still didn’t have internet in my flat (7 months in, raggggggggeee). Naturally I asked if it could be a phone interview or if we could schedule it for another time…

This was an interview for a school program, not a job, but still funny to me. I had to demonstrate proficiency in a specific language. The interviewer pointed to a photograph hanging on his wall and asked me to describe it. It was a farm scene, and there was a tractor. I could not remember the word for tractor for a…

I got sent on an audition maybe 14 years ago for an ‘80s-style jukebox musical. (I can’t/don’t sing; my agent knew this; she sent me anyway because I don’t know why.) My monologue was Miller’s “plate of shrimp” speech from Repo Man, but on cocaine. I NAILED it. My song was “Take On Me” by A-Ha, because if nothing else…

I applied for a job with an optical technology company, in a position that was mostly marketing-based. The interviewer spent most of the time quizzing me on obscure calculus and geometry topics, including asking me to recite equations.

When I was in high school I tried to get a job at Hot Topic. (Back when it was goth-knock off, not whatever it is today, ‘k?) Within minutes of starting the interview I knew there was no way I was going to get hired. They made me “audition” with two guys competing for same job. The guy interviewing me was as giant…

Oh, oh! I got caught in a massive rainstorm waiting for the bus for my interview. Was mid-house move, so had no umbrella on my person (AND it was a sunny DC morning until the moment it wasn’t!). Myself and another bus-stop-waiter caught a cab together downtown. I was absolutely soaking, the kind of wet you get when…

I was feeling kind of weird about this job in the first place. I had had one interview that went well with the one owner and was back for a final interview with the other. He spent the whole time peeping down my top and asking me off the cuff questions about the female owner. I finally asked if they were married or…

Why would Wales leave. If this is to with EU vote you do realize that they voted to leave EU. I see a lot of Americans not understanding this.

Speaking of corgis, I spent a chunk of this afternoon going through the last six months of photos from my phone. Please enjoy this rather magnificent faceswap with my Ralph the Corgi calendar.

“He had to convince Chyna to carry his low metabolic seed” is the best sentence I’ve read in ages

I’ve decided their relationship is more like poor Nobleman romances American heiress to save family estate. He’s well education and fancy, but poor (only one pair of boots). She rich with her own jet and will buy his proud but poor family out of debt and restore the family country home. They both plan on learning to…

Do Yanks really call it the Eurocup? Wow

Preach it. Those rules were invented at a seeeriously restrictive time when women dressed themselves as Colorforms, all from the same set— codified hairdos and colors for every season and lengths for every age— so why do people still feel beholden to this Dark Ages boolshit?

I have no idea. I *think* she means that the dress in question is short-ish and flared/fun which is, I guess, juniors-y? The “rules” about what “older” women should and should not wear just piss me off so damn much. I would hate this comment in any context, but it is particularly bizarre when we have women (and men)…

could have gone for a slightly more mature silhouette but the sparkles are fun;

Judith Chalmers (80s TV presenter legend), Jean Paul and Tinie Tempah. This is the best red carpet. I expect nothing less from AbFab.

Look at Jerry Hall wearing flats so she won’t tower over the walking penis next to her.