Each team should get a set number of Crime Points that can be assigned to individual players as crimes are committed, and once a player reaches, say, 51 Crime Points then a graduating set of punishments would be assigned by the league based on the player’s total Crime Points over a 3-year period. After 3 years, the…

The SEC should make a lawyer approve the statements she makes in interviews.

That is actually the best explanation I’ve seen for this. So maybe I got it all wrong. Thanks.

Hope you saw this one. I just can’t imagine anyone at Splinter being able to write something this good, even HamNo.

They’re in a conference with a team named the “Redskins”. 

He was convinced he had just drafted Christian Laettner. “We drafted the greatest player in the history of Duke sports! We won’t need touchdowns if we can shoot 45% from the 3-point line.”

You should try reading Splinter. It’s the web equivalent of a junior high school newspaper whose faculty adviser is a substitute teacher.

At least he went out with a bang. AND a whimper. 

Unless he was being sarcastic. In which case “excellent” was the most brilliant word selection in the history of the Milky Way galaxy!

See my previous comment that addresses this exact point. 

After posting my comment, I thought maybe Gabe was saying Smith was doing an excellent job of being Kirk Cousins rather than being an excellent QB. But even at that, KC always had outstanding passing yard stats, just not usually at the moments it was most important to get some passing yards in a given game. 

He’s making, what, $50 million guaranteed? And he seems to have a good family life. Probably > marginally above avg.  

Alex Smith was doing an excellent job replacing Kirk Cousins...

Then don’t enable him. Name him. Put it in a press release. And release the emails in question.

Too bad the Academy rarely rewards comedic performances. This is far more Oscar-worthy than either ‘The Wife’ or ‘A Star Is Born’.

Ali-Liston lasted longer.

What is wrong with you? You’re just terrible at this.

That’s a dumber comment than your earlier one. Who gives a shit if you’re unable to find any drama or action in golf?

Rickie Fowler, Jason Day, and Bubba Watson did not grow up rich. And it’s actually harder to find a place for a poor kid to play golf and learn the game than it is in a sport like basketball or football, where every school has a team.

Yes, unlike the NFL, MLB, NBA, NHL, NCAA, and Pro Tennis circuits, which are all proletarian exercises in egalitarianism, appealing first and foremost to the poor person in all of us sitting in the Poverty Suites at our publicly funded stadiums and arenas.