“Horton, Here’s a Poo!”

Yea, hulking out in front of the ump is not a praguematic choice

I wish I could listen to this in surround sound because even on my laptop the rocks clacking together as the crew walk around on them sounds amazing.

Now that’s some offensive rebounding!

It puts the lotion on its skin or else it goes bankrupt again

LMFAOOO are you seriously bitching about “casuals” invading your Pokemon? i’m fucking crying rn this is too hilariously pathetic to be real.

On the plus side, this tainted meat scandal makes him a shoo in for an Arby’s sponsorship.

Obligatory:

Damn, that’s a surprising and excellent example.

So...it’s the 70s and he’s fucking dolphins. Is this the most appropriate point ever to note that cocaine is a helluva drug?

Amateurs.

This is classic furry passive aggressive speciesism (if you’ve ever been around furries, which I have for good and bad - they’re a constant source of amusing drama, but there are hygiene and money issues).

Aw man, it’s so beautiful, when a man, and a woman, bring a little bundle of joy into the world and then he disavows paternity but also sets up an irrevocable trust on behalf of the baby, who will never want for anything in this mortal world but a simple sign of love from the patrician-but-tacky old man who brings a…

Tough decision. His heart is between a rock and a hard place.

This comment is not quite lowbrow, but not quite highbrow either. Let’s just call it middlebrow...

Suns Browbeaten

On one hand, I weirdly admire someone taking a beating with a straight face, including Marco Rubio. On the other hand, fuck him and his rhetorical side-stepping, which has all the inconspicuousness of sneaking around in tap shoes.

Virtue and Moir inject their genetic material into fibrous husks which then incubate the fetus as it gestates. It’s all very quick and efficient.

Barry, you prude, you’re acting like you’ve never stuffed a platonic friend’s muff in your face then transitioned her into a hurricarana in the name of competition before.