HBO’s hit new series: Tru Titstective.

HEY! That’s “signed an enormous contract and then immediately lost his starting job to a draft pick whose fans lustily booed him on draft night” Mike Glennon of the Chicago Bears to you!

There’s almost a Patrick Bateman quality to it.

This is really all that needs to be said.

And yet you took the time to make a post about how much this bothers you. Hello pot, this is my friend kettle. You guys should get along famously since you’re oh so much alike.

Robert Kraft?

+1 Star = -1 Bloody Suit

For a man who is no stranger to hyperbole when describing things like “the most beautiful piece of chocolate cake” he sure wilts when it comes to describing things of actual consequence.

Trump Steaks: Yuuuuuuuge.
Pol Pot: Not a nice guy.

When did the Trumps adopt Michael Cera?

It wouldn’t have taken long either, since I assume one has shriveled up and closed and that’s why a lot of shit seems to come out when his mouth opens.

It means raising a lot of messy existential and philosophical questions about what it is to be Stephen A. Smith that I’m not sure are worth dredging up.

Plus the Chiefs just drafted a likely bust at QB to replace Alex Smith’s 5 yard bombs, so the timing is right...

For lack of more eloquent words, every time Kellyanne says someone’s line of questioning is unkind it makes me want to fucking puke.

The Bears were disappointed to find out they couldn’t trade picks to try to draft the orangutan in the first round and settled for Mitch Trubisky.

I don’t remember that line specifically, but I absolutely read it with his voice in my head and laughed harder than I should have.

After all, real tough guys make posts whining about the content of websites. Would you like a tissue?

This. If you paid for a ticket, or are watching Goodell on TV to boo him, he’s happy.

Somehow it’s always about New York. I’m amazed we got through a New England Patriots Super Bowl in Houston, against a team from Atlanta without a “Yankees Suck” chant.

Here’s an idea, grow the fuck up. Or perhaps you need a safe space since your delicate Conservative snowflake sensibilities have been hurt.

Did I do it right?

I can definitely see the rationale behind that. In fairness, I would say that the message they were trying to get across was hijacked by the media circus and spun off in very different directions, so while I would agree that in that way they’ve failed, I give them credit because it’s not for a lack of trying. Maybe…