What did I misunderstand? I’m seriously asking, because I can’t see how playing with a different controller would have been impossible. Do other controllers no longer connect to the system? Are his hands incapable of using a different controller? I get that a different controller wouldn’t do exactly what he wanted,…

That’s embarrassing.

I did actually read it, and there was no reason he couldn’t play with a regular controller. He couldn’t play exactly the way he wanted, so he didn’t bother playing.

No, did you?

“I was afraid I might lose, so I didn’t even try.”

Is there a reason that it would be impossible to play the game with a normal controller? Yeah, I didn’t think so. Suck it up, buttercup.

Gotta say, it didn’t look that impressive, though that may be a result of the camera angles.

I’m 42 and I bet I look younger than both of you!

How would one play with these figures? Some figures are for decoration, and sometimes displaying them in the box is the best way.

See, I think it’s because Psyduck has a bill and appears to be a mammal, much like a platypus. And since the commenter’s name is Platypus Man, he is either, a) a platypus fan, or b) an actual platypus, or c) an unholy mix of human and platypus. Either way, it seems clear that he would like a character similar to a…

Nice article, deadspin reader Ben who likes snooker. I actually read the entire story with interest, despite the fact that I know nothing of snooker.

What a tool.

Merkel invites Ivanka because she knows that a handbag and jewelry “designer” is smarter and more informed than the President of the United States. And Merkel and Germans know Ivanka’s dumber and less informed than an average human. I just want to cry.

That’s what amazes me. There is absolutely nothing good about this man, nothing decent, nothing honorable, nothing honest, not intelligent, not talented—he is the opposite of all those things. Just a shitty human. Yet millions of Americans suppprt him. How can I not think those people are shitty?

While in bed.

Like translating Finnegan’s Wake, kind of.

Pong.

Shut it down. The sports Internet has been won for the day.

So, is the fear that these “suspicious looking” people may be selling counterfeit chips?

He doesn’t always know his good work from his bad. And I’m sure he resents that those two early records define him in many people’s minds. Them’s the breaks.