And even if he lived in SimCity and lived among the other Sims as a Sims character, he wouldn’t be processing rape kits. He’d just build a swimming pool, invite all the rape victim Sims into the pool, and then delete the pool ladder so he could watch them all struggle to get out till they drowned.

Poll: Half of Republicans are morons assholes.

ME TOO 

It does suck. Her tone is shitty and obnoxious. The first time I read it (because I was genuinely happy there was going to be an advice column on Jez), she started giving advice and then went off on a rant about the person’s email address and how terrible it was. I don’t like long wacky email addresses either, but…

I too would like to know. This is the 3rd time i’ve read this column and thought, “Who the f is this person, they write like an asshole.”

Paltrow apparently struggled at first, for she rarely so much as walked anywhere. 

As someone who currently lives next door to an illegal dog breeding business where there are literally 25 dogs that bark constantly between the hours of 11 am and 4 am, I agree. People who don’t know how to take care of their fucking dogs should be constantly complained about. Constantly. That’s not cool, it’s cruel,…

I don’t think I could keep a straight face while someone’s trying to have a low-key conversation with me while a bunch of clunky triangles speed around on their chest.

Keto

She definitely is. But I think her desire to constantly suck her own dick distracts her. She literally only cares about getting the throne, which duh this is “Game of Thrones”, after all. I think I sympathize with Jon Snow kind of being like, “You all need to stfu and listen to me. Most of you didn’t believe there…

Also, Dany loses her last allies because she’s constantly high on the smell of her own farts. “WHY ARE YOU NOT CALLING ME QUEEN RIGHT NOW WHAT IS THIS SHIT. I AM THE QUEEN. DID I NOT SAY THAT YET BECAUSE I AM. QUEEN.”

Good! The first incident took me by surprise and I definitely was like, “Uh...are you seriously blaming me for you dropping your ticket?” He kept saying he wasn’t “blaming” me, and I told him that what he said was incredibly rude and he tried to say something else but i just kind of turned around and said really…

Your second point makes a lot of sense. Even when we think we’re done changing, or don’t really notice that we have changed, it takes us by surprised when something like this happens.

I just assume Trump was actually raised and educated by a television set. Most of the shit he says and his “logic” are based around all the stuff he’s watched and absorbed from basic cable tv.  

Passive aggressive blaming? Is that a thing? It’s now the second time I’ve gotten it from my husband. A couple nights ago we went out to dinner and had to speed walk to catch a movie I bought us tickets to. Restaurant and theater were 3 blocks away from each other, but still. After we left the restaurant, I handed him…

I’m not a fan of his constant yelling, but I feel like I could stand him over a season of Lena Dunham trying to explain everything in a quirky and stupid way to anyone who even glances at her.

I lived in San Francisco for a very long time and my number one complaint of BART was when someone would fucking eat a breakfast burrito right next to me at like 6 pm. I’m assuming they bought the burrito sometime in the a.m., essentially making it a 10-hour old breakfast burrito that I would have to smell while…

I just imagine Angelina’s family playing this video on loop at her funeral someday, like “This is what we have to remember our dear Angelina by, for eternity.”

We trained our German Shephard with the Monks of New Skete thing and that shit WORKS.

I’m an older (in my 30's) non-traditional college student who went to community college and then transferred to a 4-year university, and when I was leaving my community college one morning (which is located behind a massive high school) wearing a backpack, I was walking around downtown a little adjacent to the high…