Woot woot! Ain’t no party like an F train party ‘cause an F train party don’t stop!

I just ... what delusions of grandeur even are they operating under

I don’t wash my herbs because I know what I’ve put on them (nothing bad) and I don’t eat the roots. So many herbs are delicate and a wash ruins them. Also if you’re putting them in oil, they pop if they’re wet.

All I can figure is these people have never gone camping and had crazy fun nature sex.

I immerse myself in a vat of acetone twice daily — breathing thru a metal straw, because plastic tubes dissolve. Only then do I call myself truly clean.

Off to read the recaps!

Can we also talk about the fact that Chrissy Teigen “sleeping” through his acceptance speech was probably not a coincidence?

Of COURSE they’re all white, too. And the one on the right has his wiener out for all to see.

Stop with the lies! This is the un-photoshopped picture

Seriously

Two things: 1) Why is Keanu so worried about aging since he’s obviously a vampire? 2) 52 year old, long haired Keanu is HOT

I fucking love Keanu Reeves.

I almost feel sorry for the guy until I remember that he grew up benefiting from the enslavement and murder of hundreds of thousands of people.

More mistakes?

Never doubt Our Orange Overlord’s ability to make any situation worse. Ivanka could have just quietly swallowed this business setback and got on with her life, BUT NO! The triple O has to bitch, and Nordstrom gets to reiterate that sales are the reason for this decision. He is actually humiliating his daughter by his…

Holy shit. Your side note should be included in the article.

When I was 19 years of age, the sexual proclivities of young people wasn’t anything, anything like I see today.

This was the backside of one of my women’s march signs:

Do you also get the most incredulous faces? Like WHOA I AM A MAN YOU SEE ME RIGHT?

In a similar but unrelated note, I now bump into men who walk right into my path instead of moving to the side as we pass on narrow sidewalks.