He stole it after Andy DuFresne broke out of Shawshank.

Say all the negative things you want about Hitler, but he did kill Hitler.

You’re thinking of Hwil Hwheaton.

Boy, is his face going to be red when he is introduced to the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff.

Can you use it in a sentence? You know, so I don’t have to look it up.

Brett Gardner decided to fuck the bat rack.

I hope she can cook because she is circus fucking ugly.

He absolutely looks like a guy who could direct you to the hammock district.

Dustin Diamond with gout.

Well, looks like I have something to google tonight. Can I locate Missouri on a map for partial credit?

RIP Reginald VelVohnson.

I don’t really watch the NBA at all except maybe a few moments in the Finals, but I really enjoyed this piece. I have always known of Ray Ratto but was never sure where he worked and what his angle was. I believe I was made aware of him by an appearance or a possible guest hosting gig on the Dan Patrick Show but I…

I am eagerly anticipating the Donny Most Football League.

I shan’t return due to bad experiences with two of my birthday parties.

She, like her throw, is a 50-footer.

A Challenger joke?

If he would have just put the ball in his pocket, like Hawk Harrelson so often recommended, this could have been avoided.

“The Case of the Six Billion Dollar Man and the Hundo Handy J.”

Hockey is played by morons, for morons.

“If I Did It” by Donald J. Trump.