Scottie dogs on/driving a train. Please, please, please!

From the look on its face, it is putting in some serious effort in that direction.

Come on, baby! Poop like you've never pooped before!

I feel a little ambivalent about using the descriptor "nice" when talking about Batman. Surely it would be better replaced with "fucking awesome".

The station that showed Poltergeist that night must have gotten fantastic ratings.

All joking aside, that speech is fucking awesome. I'm so glad he called them on that bullshit.

Ah yes. I wondered if a beehive might be involved somewhere here. That must be the unaccounted for foot. Carry on!

Maybe she was seven feet tall? Because if she were eight feet tall, she'd have to be six foot eight to start with and... maybe the math is not what I should be taking from this story.

The first one made my head hurt; the second one made me giggle; the third turned it into a form of art. Hilarious art.

But if Chris doesn't protect the hallowed space that is GASP, whom will? WHOOOOOOOMMMMMM?

Hmm. Wow. Yup, I can see why they would want to limit the dissemination of that.

But there's no selective force against the clitoris, either. I mean, it could, through a series of mutations, eventually diminish and disappear, but there's no reason why it should or will.

When she was working as a lifeguard, one of these bastards got my Mum in the eyes. In the eyes, y'all. Her entire face was bandaged up for about two weeks, and the doctors weren't even sure if she'd be able to see when they took them off. (She's fine now, though her vision does suck—I'm not sure how connected that is…

Oh, god, you and me both—I was like: "But, I don't think they're lesbians! Is this ironic?" In fact, I didn't catch on until I saw your comment.

Fremdschamen! I hope I've spelt that right—somebody on here taught it to me a couple of weeks ago, and boy, oh boy, do I suffer from it too.

That's fair enough—but I would argue that those profs are by far the minority.

I totally see it! Also, she is incredibly beautiful and totally right about what a massive douchebag that guy is. It's kind of pathetic that he can't imagine somebody going through life without amassing people who loathe them, though.

Wow. Not to bring the Srs Bzns, but speaking as someone who grew up in an academic family, surrounded by academics, your experience must be pretty limited. I have never known anyone who worked harder than tenured faculty members.

I'm so glad you were able to touch him. I can't imagine what I would have felt if someone had told me that I couldn't touch my brother's body. It's like a need, a physical compulsion to reach out one last time, and it seems beyond cruel to try to stop people from doing that, though on an intellectual level I'm able to…

I know, right? I was like "WTF?"