That Dragnet movie with Hanks and Aykroyd is bland as hell, but the bit where Aykroyd stops finally referring to Connie Swail as “The Virgin Connie Swail” is fucking great.

It seems hypocritical to keep referring to it as an egg and not a chicken.

The resemblance is uncanny in more ways than one.

On the one hand, yes, it’s kind of classless to attempt that shot. On the other hand, who fucking cares? Why do sports have to be so sanctimonious all of the time?

Officer: Nice work, but you’re lucky to be alive right now.

Phil Jackson does not pay Carmelo Anthony’s salary. If anything, it’d be more accurate to say Carmelo Anthony pays Phil Jackson’s.