Yeah, uh.

They do realize that a “unicorn” in the online dating world typically refers to a bisexual woman willing to have NSA sex (or be in a long-term sexual relationship with, I’m not sure which is considered rarer) a hetero couple, right? This must be one of those shows that got created because the network heads were like…

smash players are so precious. They want everything hyper optimized to make the game completely unsurprising. First they cut down to no items. Then they cut down stages to Final Destination. Then they cut down undesirable characters who “randomize” (not to mention defensive characters like Jigglypuff). It actually…

Sex is part of culture. Sex games are part of gaming culture. It fits perfectly within the themes of the website. People like you, especially now a days, need to learn to ignore things you have no interest in, instead of trying to ruin it for everyone else who do enjoy those articles. Move on. It's not offensive, and…

I mean, it wasn’t a great article, but I’m not sure it required an apology.  

I think (hope?) he’s saying that he doesn’t want to get even the mild spoilers so won’t read this piece, but that he appreciates that the author posted it nonetheless.

This article is way too fucking long in service of a sequel to a mediocre game.

Ah.... misery porn.

Dear Game Developers,

“In one of the most surprising moments of the demo, I quietly dispatched somebody while their dog was distracted. Upon noticing, the dog proceeded to nudge their person’s arm, then pull on it, and then mournfully whimper.”

Duder not to nitpick but you don’t need to describe Ellie as a “young queer woman” I’m a lesbian and the best thing you can do for gays is to not let that define us even if we have partners ya know? Like you don’t need to describe JD Fenix as a young Angelo Saxton cismale he’s just some guy, like “it” not mattering is…

You get a hot waifu in Dark Souls 3!

Maybe because the small screen instead of a theater?

My son can wear whatever he wants while making $330 mill

Ummm because Ian Desmond isn’t a soul sucking Hecubus? 

choosing which team will employ him for virtually the entire rest of the good part of his baseball career

“Sports hate” is a thing and part of fandom; it’s totally fine to boo the guy you used to love who got a bigger check elsewhere! It just shouldn’t cross into actual hate unless you got a very Mayweather-y, Roethlisberger-y reason to do so. And definitely leave kids out of it!

This is tough because Harper was/is fun as shit to watch play, but personally insufferable. Dumb and self-righteous and also just dumb as dog shit.

It doesn’t even fake match up. It’s so poorly done that your brains natural urge to sync them up isn’t working. This is junk.

We’ll start with the hole-poking,