for jon and only for jon, i will consent to being a sister wife.

and then he should marry me

I’m not ready for an election without Jon Stewart. His replacement does nothing for me.

I don’t think she’ll be that shiny in NH. To paraphrase Stephen King, you can put frosting on a turd, but it’s still a turd.

This reminds me of when my cat turned the deadbolt from the inside while I was out one night and my boyfriend at the time had to kick my door in. They don’t need no stinkin’ thumbs.

Talk to me after you’ve sucked a dick, Brody.

Old cat owner here. I feel you. Mine demands new food every time she decides she’s hungry, even though the “old” kibbles were put out mere hours earlier. And, the dining room light must be on regardless of the time she decides to snack. She has no sight issues, just demands. Sigh.

I’ll trade cats with you. Mine can start that crap as early as 3:00 am.

It’s all true, this Feline Science. Cats really CAN drive you crazy! I know this to be true; I am an Animal Behaviorist who has studied, and been owned by cats for more than 50 years.

(resubmitted for relevancy) (ish)

but what does Jenny McCarthy think?

It’s not about diminishing her responsibility by claiming mental illness, it’s about understanding her motives and responsibility without burning her at the stake. All this fucking hatred directed at her doesn’t do anything. Show some restraint and wait for the story to develop before eviscerating the perpetrator.

If Rachel has always felt like a white woman trapped in a black woman’s body, is it for us to say that she’s “lying”?

If you live in or near LA, I can't see how you can NOT go. It's $15. I'd pay three times as much without blinking. Besides Richard loves his superfans. On the NPR show they said that he's super-interactive too, poking fun, hanging with the class people. It sounds freaking awesome.

For crying out loud! I'm supposed to be offended on this person's behalf? I'll be hoarding my precious store of fucks to give to worthier posts.

I got to the end of the article and went 'good lord, everbody sucks'.

Also? Grimace is awesome. Fuck that guy.

Best Buy. Identifying celebrity voice overs in commercials is one of my useless super powers.

What's most hilarious is that he seems to think a "sleeper cell" is an actual cell in which people can go to and sleep together.

I have an email I got from Richard Simmons glued on my fridge.