So here’s a thought, we live in a society that lets people own bears right? And ANYONE can get a bear easily and cheaply. I understand that some people can safely own bears, but keeping bears around kids and people who don’t know how to care for bears is a bad idea. However people keep saying that our violent bear…

Americans don’t have to worry about ISIS. To quote Pogo,

Truthfully, no lives matter. We did nothing after Sandyhook. Kinda shows that we don’t care who dies, even little kids. Once you’re okay with that, the discussion ends.

It is SO FUCKING sexy. That, and hold a kitten. We’re done.

No choice? We women call that rape. Or the GOP.

Our family tradition at Christmas is to go out Christmas Eve for lunch at a greasy spoon, be polite to the server, and leave a $100 tip in cash. It’s kind of selfish, actually— we all get to feel super altruistic, and we race to get out before the server finds the cash and feels like they need to thank us.

I would have thought Colonel Sanders would be a breast man.

Not directly related, but I always found interesting how Colonel Sanders (or “Uncle Kentucky” as he’s known in Japan) is viewed in Japan.

My favorite anecdote is how celebrating Hanshin Tigers Baseball fans threw a local Colonel Sanders prop into a river after winning the Japan Series title in 1985... prompting a…

NO YOU DON’T THAT’S WHY YOU’RE A SERVER

That has happened to me at every single place I’ve ever worked. Now that I’m self employed, people call me after hours all the damn time.

Oh my god, your hours are insane, and your employers should be stopped. Down here, 10-5 is pretty standard, and 11-4:30 isn’t unusual. Most of the tasting rooms here — not sure about where you are in Oregon (you’re in Oregon, right?) — are between 15-30 minutes from the nearest town (food/lodging), and yet I would…

The platinum card one is awesome, and totally reminds me of this former student at my husband’s school. He loved to brag about the places he’d gone out to dinner with his wife, and granted, these restaurants were higher caliber than Ruby Tuesday, but they weren’t like, private clubs or exclusive restaurants where…

NEVER. EVER. FUCK. WITH. THE. DELIVERY. DRIVER.

Seriously, if the banners were really about sex (and not about intimidating young women) then shouldn’t they read something like “Ladies, we are fucking awesome at sex and you will leave VERY satisfied.” I’d much rather go to those guys’ party if I were at college.

Very effective. Just reading the phrase “which hole is the clit??” made my clit climb into my body to hide.

Less than 2 ct?! Pffffff

I just had to come here to say that “drunk-driving, taco-wanting ass” is the funniest thing I’ve heard in months. It could be a band name. And ultra big ups (ultra-big ups?) for the proper use of the hyphen on the two (two) compound adjectives. This is so great.

Oh jeez. I hadn’t even considered the Jarod factor until you said that. LOL.

I also suggest imagining her in all white to achieve full justice boner.