Was anyone else one of those uber-sensitive kids who ascribed feelings to their toys and stuffed animals? I used to play with all of my toys on a rotation because I was afraid of hurting their feelings. I kind of did that with my clothes too - I would feel guilty if I didn't wear my red shirt for a while because I was…

My MIL managed to throw shade without writing a word when she left me off the Christmas card one year.

Yeah, I'm having a hard time putting her down.

My head might explode if Hermione becomes a princess.

in.front.of.them.

This whole thing is like my nightmare. Surprise monster baby will haunt my dreams.

Yes. I get so tired of answering 'So why did you decide to become vegetarian?' How can I honestly answer this without coming across judgy as shit? Eating habits are not that interesting.

Speaking of Orange is the New Black did anyone read this facebook page about how Dascha Polanco (Dayanara Diaz) dumped her old cats for new kittens. She dumped her two cats in a cardboard box unexpectedly (and rudely) at a adoption event and she just posted on her instagram page that she adopted two new kittens (she…

One day, I was home visiting my parents. I got a sudden craving for chocolate so I dug around the kitchen and finally found some boxes of baking chocolate. I take it into the living room to eat while watching tv. First bite, I notice it tastes a little off but figured it was just kind of old and was losing flavor.…

Oh, joy — finally a time to capitalize on a bizarre and often mindbogglingly childhood. Monsterpuss's Dad is of the creed that eating habits are testament to one's character — and that seeking out the slimy, the fetid, and the possibly poisonous in your backyard means you are more clever, more attractive, possibly…

She left her ass all lumpy, lol.

A couple of years ago there was a law in my state banning a list of "offensive" names, it was later rules by the national goverment unconstitutional to ban names. The list was actually hilarious.

Oh look I found it!

This is not a bad thing. Bars that hire exclusively female bartenders are likely not doing it because of their skills (although many of them definitely are highly skilled and great at what they do) - they're doing it because they want to add eye candy and please male patrons. A bro has a better night out if he can…

No, you've got it all wrong. A lawsuit like this is GOOD for feminism. I'm sure this chain is guilty of what they have been accused of, as with other (Hooters, breastaurants of various sorts of variety). The more we limit women as being seen as attractive ornaments to draw in customers the better for ALL of us.

I get all my medical advice from yahoo.

Aren't cakes supposed to be celebratory? Like yay I'm celebrating the fact that I'm a gigantic oozing arsehole. With cake.

My mom and I permed my hair 3 times at home over the course of my third grade year.* It never took until the last go-round and I had hair as big as a lion mane. It took until 5th grade for both of us to admit it did not, in fact, look good. I went to my first professional haircut and the stylist said, "Good Christ, I…

Can you even imagine what it must be like to find out you were raped by seeing the event on video? I can't. My heart goes out to her.