You mean the “Team America” puppet and the grimy anger-management case?

Before you ever start drinking, make sure you know exactly how many you’re going to have

um are we gonna talk about how fucking COOL she looks without her robe and fancy collar on?

schlubs. schlubs aint gonna get no love from me...hanging out the side of ya best mans ride tryin to holla at me.

Any USC fan ever that won’t shut the fuck up about how good that team was.

Same here. I got 6 months into my pregnancy before I realized it (long story) and was drinking that entire time. Got pretty wasted a couple times, too. Kiddo is 4 now and healthy as can be.

This is kind of good advice, but I just don’t see many people following it.

But who didn’t let Leinart go?

Wow, Matt Leinart really let himself go.

The way he smiles and repeats “Me!” is honestly one of my favorite moments in the entire series.

Then she photoshopped any waist away.

Considering how little I imagine kourtney now eats, I imagine there is practically no stool in her bathroom at any time.

Khloe has some organic flour and some PAM on her meticulously ordered shelves, so we know she loves baking? I must be a fucking pastry chef.

GIMME PIZZA YOU OLD TROLL

You know they have mirrors on the ceilings of their bedrooms, and they will only do it reverse cowgirl, so they can watch themselves.

10 out of 10 would get vertigo there!

You know who has white pillows on outdoor furniture? That’s right, assholes have white pillows on outdoor furniture.

Cool. Meanwhile I’m legitimately scared to stay at my apartment tonight because I heard a bunch of gunshots outside my window last night.

I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: If I can’t re-enact scenes from Miley Cyrus videos in the bathroom, don’t even bother showing it to me. Wasting my time.