Hot take: Woody Allen is the male Stephanie Meyer. Literally everything he writes is just versions of his own sexual fantasies starring him.

PLUS the Allen character usually has no redeeming qualities and for all intents and purposes is a huge asshat. So why exactly would women be falling all over themselves to sleep with this character?? I’ve never gotten any of his movies, for this reason, with the exception of Bullets over Broadway and that’s because…

I’ll never forget that one with Julia Roberts and how he had his twelve year old kid (in the movie) spy on Roberts’ therapy sessions with his ex wife to get in her pants. The whole film I’m sitting there going How is this considered okay?

“Dweebish,” literary men who are often seen as stand-ins for Allen himself, sometimes even played by Allen himself. But nope, no one sees a connection... and Soon Yi is clearly so very devoted to him, so how can you fault a man for ~falling in love~ with her just because he was a paternal figure* throughout her…

...with much older men who look like Allen, no less. His offerings should have to compete with science fiction because nothing but mind control explains that.

For every “deep” or “real” woman that Woody Allen has written/created (and I would argue some of those characters are vastly overrated), there’s an equally cringe-worthy one he’s unleashed upon the public. Consider the following roles, which range from merely unremarkable to downright awful, stereotype-laden, dreck:

It’s like if Ted Bundy made dozens of movies about necrophilia, Woody is just not hiding his predilections at all. Let’s not pretend people don’t know what he is, they just don’t care.

Message to Kate.

My guess is that this guy has conjured 50 women from:

10 women who let him feel under their shirts, but he couldn’t get the bra off and they got bored

when she was 14-years-old

Celibate Worms - they’re just like us!

Last night I found out that 1. KJ Apa is from New Zealand and 2. That he’s 20 years old.

I was genuinely amazed to learn that as of the first season of Riverdale he was, technically, still a teenager.

I think Tim Murphy should have been forced to carry his unviable career to full term.

The One America Campaign is the charity all our living former presidents created in the wake of the disasters:

Shelter box USA is on the ground in the Caribbean:

Lifehackerhad this a while ago to help.

The Hispanic Federation

NPR has a good list of groups.

Guys, its almost here. T-2 days. Bojack Horseman season 4 drops Friday. Prepare now, because I am going to need to discuss this season starting Saturday.