I’m just here to complain about how I live around joshua trees and only joshua trees, and if you tried to anchor a hammock to one it would destroy it/hurt you, probably, and I don’t really have anything else to anchor it to :( Boo hoo.

I’m just here to complain about how I live around joshua trees and only joshua trees, and if you tried to anchor a…

Yeah, not a lot, apparently. I’m just going with what the paramedic teacher and EMTs I worked with told me. 

The paramedic that taught my class told us that. And no, I don’t understand cardiology well enough to know anything further. I think they said it has something to do with the right side typically being stronger in men, so maybe it’s more of a case of if women get right side heart failure, they’re more likely to have a…

I’m a first responder. We use a fancy HeartStart machine that does basic EKGs and can also deliver a shock. I was actually surprised when I found out that it can really only look at issues on the left side of the heart, which is where men typically have problems. Women are more likely to have right side issues. From…

He was just on his way to stockmarket to do a business.

This is perfect. I HATE astrology (I work in astronomy) and libertarianism. 

“Leslie, I typed your symptoms into the thing up here, and it says you could have ‘network connectivity problems.” - Andy Dwyer

Ugh, really? I didn’t know that and now I am very disappoint.

True. I’m a park ranger so I have kind of a biased view on this. We have so many situations where someone has done something stupid “for the insta” and then they have broken laws, damaged resources, or put rescuers lives’ in danger. 

JAWSOME

“An uncontrollable situation” where the sharks forced you at gunpoint to get in the water???

And a good safety message about not hiking in areas that could flash flood when there is any chance of rain.

THANK YOU. I can’t stand this unscientific nonsense. We can all learn to cold read, or any of their other tricks. 

People sometimes come to where I work and demand, “Do you know who I AM?” Someone else once got away with answering, “No...do you? Sir? Are you okay? Are you experiencing memory loss? We need to get you to the hospital!” 

I always played (still do) as Bowser, and you’re goddamn right.

I am so over taking the high road with people who are so far off any road it doesn’t even matter.

I want all Holt gifs, all the time.

I love Terry almost as much as Terry loves yoghurt.

Excellent, thanks.

Does anyone have suggestions for ways I could help out that aren’t monetary? I am not really in the place to donate right now (and I know even being able to consider donating is a big privilege) but I hate feeling that I can’d do anything. I know calling reps is something, but there isn’t even any legislation out…