Starting four years ago, I came upon the realization that I want to have John Oliver's babies. I already thought he was great on TDS and then I saw him in person at an event in DC, and he was even better. But alas, he's married to some conservative blonde lady who is super attractive. Whhhyyy.

Cool your jets. I said his face was irrelevant but I mentioned it out of spite, because I DON'T KNOW, he has explicitly stated women are inferior at math and science and that bugs me, dontchaknow? If you would like to know, I think Ben Bernanke is a bit of a silver fox. For a Fed chairman. And surprise surprise, the…

Ugh, NO. Just because he mentored Sheryl Sandberg doesn't mean he gets a pass. And...I don't like his face. Yes, the least one is illogical, but the man is a screw up in a myriad of ways.

I meant because he said this:

Unfortunately, there aren't enough women covering politics, not that some women don't make this sort of mistake whether out of laziness or some other reason, and the "bimbo explosion" storyline is what these reporters are used to. Sometimes they don't consider details like this, or why they're so important. I…

Something tells me he's seen "fury and burning" in women's eyes a lot, and likely has been the cause of it.

I have not been let down. Impressive work, she looks surprisingly similar.

I'm not sure that it was consensual when he sent some college student an unsolicited dick picture when she said nothing to indicate she wanted it. Not like people usually ask for dick pics but there was no flirtation there, whatsoever.

If Dick Cheney lived in Oscar Wilde times, he would look like this while he was ordering the troops to carry out more good ole' Manifest Destiny, and god knows where he would take them. The picture in his attic? Yeah, it would be the Dick pic up top.

Nicely done. Some how this feels like more of an assault to my eyes than any dick pic I've been sent in recent memory.

I like the incongruous nature of a beagle named Carlos, but yes, that would be adorable.

If it were THIS dachshund, absofrickinlutely! Especially because that dog shouldn't be named "Apple."

Oh, it just gets better. And no, I'm not naming a cat, Carlos Danger. It's going to be a dog, thank you very much. A chocolate lab or a beagle.

Yeah, I mean it's not to say that tall men aren't going to treat me with respect or let me be dominant now and then, but I do find these attitudes are pervasive with some men who do want smaller girls, because even though they're big, it makes them feel bigger? It's weird. We're perceived as more feminine which has…

DOES look good in a bow tie.* Durr.

I think this fellow, while not Jesse Williams, is quite dreamy and I'd like to be approached by this guy IRL. They style him in a truly despicable way. It's an atrocity that he went from shy sweet hottie who maybe looks cute in a bow tie to frat boy nightmare.

The hair doesn't help. It's truly horrific. IT'S FEATHERED.

He looks like he could be wearing axe. And that facial expression.

I don't think you're a bad person but I feel differently about it. As a 5'3'' tall 105-110 pound woman, and it sounds like you're petite too, I find that I'm always held and...I don't know to say this, but coveted or whatever by who I'm seeing. Like a little teddy bear or something. I kind of like being able to hold a…

Where is this build?