Yes! I often think the same thing. It's nice to have a man appreciate what you wear, and not just that it makes your boobs stand out. But, eh, it seems like too much to ask these days.

Um, whoa? They're not all Pat Bateman. What makes Patrick Bateman is entitlement and dickishness, not what he wears, trust me. Those egotistical finance guys don't dress like that anymore, generally speaking, though I have seen a few dressed to the nines working on Wall Street. Most are just wearing hackish clothes.

I usually get mine from Old Navy. I'm wearing a black bra under my white tank and you can't even tell!

I don't know where you live but there are plenty of straight dandies. You just have to know where to look.

As a bisexual lady can I just say women in white tank tops...are the best. Autostraddle did a piece on this. And by "piece" I mean a ton of pictures of sexy women in white tank tops. Dayum.

Dare I say, I like both? But yes, the dandy, a straight or bisexual one anyway, is rare for me to find, and I mean the right kind of dandy too, not a cheap imitation but a man who really knows what pocket square works with with what blazer. Men are so socially punished for looking fine that I find it rebellious and…

Yes, this is what I don't understand. How is "family issues" a magical antidote to this problem? Like someone said the pol who made a sexist remark towards a reporter was having "family issues." We all have issues of one kind or another. Being an adult means trying to keep those issues separate and only bring them…

Yes, that is my point. I don't have much of a stake in destroying someone's reputation, but she's a writer and she expects people to read it. She's getting the sort of prosecution writers typically get when something inflammatory is written.

I feel like I'm having deja vu because I don't know how to handle the eagerness of the guys I meet via online dating. Its either that they act like they're my boyfriend already once they get my phone number, which makes me feel awkward and vaguely pissed off, or they are so detached that trying to make plans is a huge…

I don't really see why Holocaust survivors just got wrapped up in it willy nilly. I know how it ties back to her dad, but the tie is not a great enough one to make it the whole thrust of an analysis. This probably is partly the child of too much anecdotal information in commentary these days, but I'm a writer and we…

I wasn't aware she had that conversation. Too bad, because otherwise I like reading Lindy. A lot of feminists have to work on their intersectionality, indeed. Race, class, sexual orientation are all things feminist sites are woefully unprepared to discuss. This site has been much better than Slate, NYT, The Atlantic,…

If that's what she meant, I don't think she worded it very well. I agree with the premise that people aren't saints just because they've been through things, but her criticism of an extreme will to live...of course people want to live. I think it's pretty ballsy to put oneself in the shoes of a Holocaust survivor and…

No, I was saying the opposite, which was no, people don't aways feel good after these conversations but they can be necessary. The other situation, where I don't point out any differences and give them a cookie for participating would leave everyone happy. I don't know what in the words I wrote came off as…

I really don't understand the Holocaust survivors comment as someone who has studied the Holocaust a good deal, because everyone knows they often have survivor guilt, intense survivor guilt. To suggest otherwise...I can't understand it.

Ugh. Well it gets worse when some students think Africa is a country and so on and so forth until a certain age. I was lucky enough to have an awesome global studies teacher and a dad with interest in cultures outside the U.S. or I would have said some pretty dumb stuff to people at parties myself, I'm afraid. :-/…

haha, sorry. I need to stop making Jezebel assumptions

I don't mean this to insinuate anyone who asks is a bad person but I can understand why people of color are fed with white people's curiosity. I mean, I understand it's not nefarious but I don't know why people care about placing someone's ethnicity, necessarily. I don't know why people ask me either. So you're French…

What if someone asks me where I'm from, in that exact phrasing, I tell them I'm from New York, and ask where they're from in the same phrasing, and I REALLY do mean where they grew up, but they bug their eyes out at me and say "The U.S. like most people." or something similar. I really didn't mean to say "Where are…

He shouldn't have asked where she "lived" then.

So creepy. Reminds me of this: