Damn. The last time I saw a man with a bad moustache cram his balls into another man’s face like that was when Billy Haisley gave Tom Ley a Cincinatti bow tie.

Truly a hair-raising experience.

In a year of truly important sports investigations done by Deadspin, this is the apex.

Dunking on fools AND combating ISIS?!?!?!

Reporter: Tom, do you like Don Trump?

Hey, as a UNC alum I am offended about something you said. but I can’t remember what, exactly...

Any idea why I cannot like any comments on Deadspin? rest of Kinja I am able to like.

My SUPER Italian grandfather used to always yell at me for not calling sauce “gravy.” I got the last laugh, though—he had a heart attack and died in his sleep.

James Naismith: Pictured

That dude in Aldo’s corner with the backwards hat...you’d think he’d just seen his family shot in front of him...damn, man.

I am because I don’t talk about golf when at parties

I asked my coworker, Tim Brady, what he thought about Trump and his plans for Muslims, and he told me to get the fuck out of his cubicle. Also I’m not a reporter. Can I still have $100?

Yes. Not to mention that as a boy, Mirza learned to hoop while bombs rained down during the Bosnian war. You remember: When Serbian leader Slobodan Milosevic’s ‘policy’ for Bosnian Muslims—kill ‘em all!—got him convicted of international war crimes.

Mirza is another Muslim athlete. Someone let the Donald know.

Mirza Teletovic is also the name of my favorite female Iranian newscaster.

The fact that the assistants have a protocol for shielding a competitor from the cameras with their bodies is kinda remarkable.

THAT HAIL MARY PLAY I CALL IT THE DENTIST BECAUSE IT KILLED SOME LIONS FROM EXTREME LONG RANGE.

Let us all pray that it eats him.

After living in NYC for nearly 10 years, I bought a home in Westchester in April. It was a pretty big adjustment, but I can walk to the Metro North train from my home in under 10 minutes each morning, which makes all the difference in the world. I cannot imagine having to drive to/from the station each day. NYC has a…

I used to hate reading Billy’s bandwagon drivel masquerading as a soccer column. Then I realized that no one could possibly be this ridiculously misinformed about anything, and concluded that his pieces are a sort of performance-art, taking the kind of breathless, over-the-top think pieces you see in European…