@Señor Flandangles: I believe that would be the third rule.

Absolutely not. Bale is fast but limited to the left flank. Any defender who has pushed him inside has essentially shut him down. Messi can play anywhere and has two excellent feet. Bale tore up a slow(ish) Maicon against a poor Inter team and everyone suddenly has a boner for the guy. He's also a decent fellow…

can someone explain what's actually going on here? i watched this game (terrible, just terrible) and didn't see this play. in any case it's freaking hilarious.

@zibby: Can't agree with you. Even the non-designated fighters adhere respect to the other player (See Sidney Crosby or even Ovechkin when they rarely engage in fisticuffs). Sean Avery is a Goon - there I said it - and nothing more. Agitators have a role, too, but Avery steps outside those bounds constantly. The NHL…

@Sapphire and Chronic: Hockey fighting code dictates you actually give the player a chance to drop his gloves and square up, which Avery doesn't do here. Watch almost any hockey fight (see above as well) and both players take the time to get prepared.

Avery proves every time to be a classless tool. He only picks fights with smaller players and does this sneak-up shit every time. Soon enough he's going to pick on the wrong player and something like this is going to happen. (Boogaard actually broke Fedoruk's face in several places here. Boogy plays for the Rangers…

"Who is Tim Duncan?"

I'll take the rapists for $800, Alex.