no, you don’t. he explicitly said in the tweets he’d never seen this guy.

He should stay away from your friend, obviously. 

“The Beast With Two Side Dishes”

then you cant have sex im sry

“Some brothers are like Cain and Abel...”

I hold Plugged In responsible for the time my mom found the 3 Doors Down album I’d just sneakily bought at The Wherehouse (in my defense, I was 13) and proceeded to read all of the “objectionable” lyrics aloud in order to shame me for my ungodly choice. Very fun.

Team Meteor all the way.

Personally, I’m rooting for the lighting rig to fall.

I was raised in such a household. The bullshit organizations like Focus on the Family feed children & teens through publications geared toward them is nauseating. I remember I had a “teen Bible” and instead of letting you make up your own mind by reading the Bible yourself, it had little “features” sprinkled…

Does fucking Ayn Rand’s corpse count as cheating on his wife?

My dog can eat rotting meat, bird shit, horse shit, etc. without getting sick. That doesn’t mean I’d suggest a human try it.

It mummified. Probably the only hazard here is mummified toe aftertaste in your drink.

“When he gets billed, if he was a dummy who let his pet outside and contributed to the situation, HE should pay for his negligence - not I. I am willing to pay for those who were bitten through no fault of their own - no problem. But if you bring it upon yourself, that’s where I get off.”

They’re similar in as much as they’re both noises made by birds. Chickens go “cuck, cuck, cuck”, while turkeys go “goebbel, goebbel, goebbel”.

I like playwrights that *don’t* die...

Steam powers trains. Does that mean if I steam my vagina, I can use it to haul coal?

Female engineers on the steam trains of yesteryear were renowned for they’re moist and clean vaginal canals.

I’m happy to explain it to you: it’s because the world is garbage. I hope that clears everything up.