"Wow! He completed the pass right into the teeth of the defense!"

Notre Dame aren't quite French, Anthony, but it's an easy mistake to make considering how quickly they capitulated during this game.

You know this country is fucked when even our chiropractors are nothing better than scam artists.

[rayburner'd]

[hugs you anyway]

Dale Earnhardt: [opens dead spin]

That looks about right.

Suspension or no suspension, he doesn't seem to be missing any plate appearances.

Well, you know what they say: "Good fences make good neighbors."

But tonight, he'll be staying here with you.

well, in this case, The Times They are-a Changin'.

"Kudos for hiring such an upstanding polite man."

There's not a single white person in the whole video! You can't promise me a video about Lance and not include any crackers.

Sometimes, Laverne Wishes She Could Take All The Shotz

Grandview would go on to win in overtime, rendering all of this absolutely meaningless.

Cubs Intern: Ummm Mr. Green, I think there is something you need to see.

Great, Peng Shuai ruins another room.

Hello Kent, and welcome to Deadspin. Seeing as how things in the Midwest seem to have a real or perceived lack of urgency, and contrasting that with the beltway insistency of even the most mundane of undertakings, my question to you is this: in all your years of journalism, have you ever sneezed and farted at the same…

I think I might do some other stuff first.