Bah. I'd have gone with Watch Russia's Greatest Sports Hero Get Damn Near Killed By Team USA.

Disabled Russians really hate Charlie Brown.

Those odds just improved thanks to your deft headline edit.

you should answer for your own hang-ups

And I thought "appalling Russian bruin" had to do with the shitty beer they put in those ridiculously chauvinistic cans.

Thank God they're finally here. To date, the only cool runnings in Sochi have been a result of eating frozen yogurt in the athletes' commissary.

Is anyone truly surprised to see a guy slip and fall? This is what happens when you put Greece at the front of a parade.

For the second time this week, a Volunteer has acted in the interest of "safety first" at a major sporting event.

It's been a good day for remarkable Russian cans.

Chernobyl.

Lost in all this manly chest-thumping is the fact that the Sochi facilities and logistics are so shitty that figure skating and ice hockey competitions are occurring on the same ice at the same time.

There's some Canadians who post here too, you know.

Thanks, but meh.

But worry not. Organizers wheeled in what's described as an "extended bed," and appears to be an ottoman.

So four kept on going but everyone wants to obsess over the one that stopped functioning.

"Is not bear. Is stray beagle local authorities rescue and lovingly bathe with fine local tap water."

Indian Gets Tipsy, Crashes, Recovers

Actually, "." means no more "+1." Did you not take biology?

.

I'm sure he slept fine, as the 5-2 win over Vancouver kept the Habs in the all-important third slot in the Atlantic.