a Jell-O-like pile of his own shortcomings

Seven bloomin' onions and a Jerky Boys cassette is Jason Whitlock's idea of a nom de fucking-with-you.

Guns don't kill people. McDonalds hamburgers kill people. Saw that on TV.

I guess hanging around with Simon LeBon has made Ovie a bit too Hungry Like the Wolf.

Also presently getting four hits a day off a Royal - Kate Middleton.

Sure, do it at a soccer game, call it planking and it garners national attention as a novelty. But do it at a St. Paul Saints minor league baseball game, call it "Kent State Night" and all that happens is you draw the scorn of a nation and a $2,500 fine from the league office.

This patient testimonial photo illustrates quite nicely why Dr. Picasso's Plastic Surgery Clinic had to file Chapter 11.

@AzureTexan

Well, there goes Pamela Des Barres' reign as the world's most famous Stone-encrusted accessory.

End of Tuinei

@David Hume

"it's the right thing."

LeBron's magical 4th quarter disappearing act in the 2011 Finals has earned him the sobriquet "NBA Legerdemain."

That ankle's at the wrong o'clock.

Well, there goes the whole "it's not easy being green" thing.

Will we make mistakes? Of course. Will we have stupid ideas? Definitely.

He split from Buick in 2008 and now he's parting ways with his Caddie. This is hardly shocking behavior from a guy who's developed a habit of driving a different Vulva every week, or so it seems.

I can only assume this was baked from a mix sold by Duncan Hineys.

"Oh, shit. It's starting again, isn't it?"

"Fifty-Some Pages of Gently Reminding You Not to Fuck Up the Brand"