So long as we're on the subject of correspondence from famous beards, I once received a birthday card from ZZ Top's drummer.

[on second thought, no]

Jesus. If I wanted to listen to a former Spartan say a bunch of stupid shit I'd simply go out and rent P.S. I Love You.

Speaking of Detroit-based institutions and Katy Perry, I see where Borders is on the verge of becoming a tits-up fucking brand.

"Qatar."

That was nearly as excruciating to watch as the Blue Jays broadcast team's coverage of David Wells poutineing in the Rogers Centre stands.

[redacted]

The turf has gotten all moldy and gross and needs to be replaced.

@norbizness: I believe that's known as a Kirstie Alley Oop

"This is pretty much a complete destruction of your Field"

"How is this news?"

Managing 5-2-2 in 24 minutes is Gary Glitter's idea of an orgy.

If the U.S. Men's Basketball Team had lost the Olympic gold medal to Japan, we would call them the biggest chokers since the Boston Strangler.

Pictured:Yet another example of 2 1/2 Men moving on without WINNING.

If you were to be around me for the next seven months, you'd probably see me pick up a club maybe one time.

I once thought I was reading a valentine for Helen Keller but it turned out to be a sheet of candy buttons.

Click and watch it grow

Baseball is certainly to blame for the sorry state of this Pie fight.

We'll always have that stupid helmet.

Ever touch yourself while wearing a jock?