This feature is best viewed with backing track of Scat Scratch Fever.

It's false advertising. Everyone knows Casey Martin is the #1 driver in golf.

That would be correct if one is to believe the statement police took from one Mr. Raymond Price of nearby Branson.

+$Texas

Riiiiiiight. That's a result of TLR contracting conjunctivitis in the same way that Nicole Simpson and Ronald Goldman once contracted a case of scarlet fever from OJ.

Very few people understand that "no shit, Sherlock" was actually a request and not a retort.

Also scoring last night despite bad service? Any Hooters waitress who wanted it.

Jesus. If the Mad Bastard had thrashed my commenting activity for the past 6 weeks or so any more viciously I'd have to believe that somehow or another my subconscious was writing the damned blog.

As is customary for any billiard-related foul, the offender was required to take one of his balls out and place it back on the table.

Wow. +1

"You say 'Dabo' while I say 'Eye-talian."

How did you ever get past the presumably impregnable barrier that was Starnell's sternly worded warning?

"You don't want to go to Winnipeg, right?" Bryzgalov said after the Coyotes lost to Detroit, Wednesday night. "Not many people live there, not many Russian people there. Plus it's cold. There's no excitement except the hockey. No park, no entertaining for the families, for the kids. It's going to be tough life for…

Aw man, I saw the term "ceremonial carpet" and I thought for sure this was going to have something to do with Katie Holmes.

And thus proves the theory that Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.

Hey, you can't spell "Copa del Greyhound" without "Copa del Rey."

"Nope, it's with a knife." - O.J. Simpson

Ever since that second kid that's exactly what it's been in my house.

Wait a minute - you mean to tell me that UND gave the NCAA a promise in October of 2007 and now they want to take that promise back? Wouldn't that make UND an . . . . .

He certainly picked the right religion. Every time he appeared on Dancing With The Stars I shook my head in disapproval and muttered "Jesus Christ."